Ranma Saotome: Transgender Warrior
by adept42
Summary: In a world without magical transformations, Ranma is still half boy and half girl.
1. Chapter 1

Prologue:

The old door broke open with one sure kick, and moonlight spilled into the boarded up theatre. "Come on Ukyo! This place looks cool!" shouted Ranma.

Ukyo followed hesitantly. "Are you sure we should be going in here?"

"We won't get in trouble. Pop and your dad sounded like they'd be talking all night."

"I guess so. What do you think they're doing?"

"Beats me. Let's go see what's backstage." Ranma tossed back the curtain. "Look at this! There's still costumes and makeup and props back here!"

The two children searched through dressers, closets, and boxes that hadn't been opened since before they were born. Ukyo got the first great find: a stage katana that looked impressively real. Ranma was jealous, but soon found something that more than made up for it: a wig still in good enough condition to look real. Ranma completed the outfit with a dress just a few sizes too big and started putting on some makeup.

"What are you doing, Ranchan?"

"I'm being a girl," said Ranma as she smiled at herself in the mirror.

"Okay, you'll be a girl and I'll be a boy," said Ukyo as he swung the katana confidently.

"Cool! You're a bad guy and capture me, but I'm so charming and pretty that I trick you into giving up your sword and I beat you!" She giggled and ran away with Ukyo right behind. He caught her, and used some rope to loosely tie Ranma up. The game went on, and Ranma really got into the seduction; she snuggled up to Ukyo and spoke softly into his ear. Ukyo untied her and laid down his sword to pull Ranma into an embrace.

In a flash, Ranma slipped free, catapulted over Ukyo's head, grabbed the katana, and pointed it at Ukyo's throat. In the process, the wig sailed off her head and landed on the stage. The smile of triumph on Ranma's face disappeared. She dropped the katana and turned away from Ukyo.

"What's wrong, Ranchan?"

"I... I can't be a girl; that's why I got sent away with Pop. Mom caught me dressing up and got really mad... said she would make me commit seppuku if I didn't come back a man among men. She's serious; she showed me the katana she'd use if I didn't go through with it." Ranma was shaking as she spoke.

Ukyo said the first thing that came into his head: "We'll run away. Nobody would be able to find us because I'd be a boy and you'd be a girl."

"It wouldn't work. People would know we were boys and bring us back."

Ukyo giggled. "I'm a girl, Ranma."

"Really? Wow! I thought you were a boy. Well if you can be a boy then I can be a girl." Ranma smiled, but her happiness was cut short when she saw her father in the doorway. "Oh no! Come on run!"

Ranma and Ukyo tried to get away, but Genma was blocking the only exit, and they couldn't get past him. He eventually managed to grab the two children and hold one in each hand. "Stop struggling Ranma. When are you going to stop wearing dresses and learn to be a man?"

Ranma just tried even harder to break free. "You can't make me! Ucchan and me are going to run away, and I'm going to be a girl all the time."

"Yeah!" shouted Ukyo. "I like Ranchan as a girl, and she likes me as a boy."

Genma paled. "Oh my. I can't imagine how upset that would make Nodoka..." He assumed his most fatherly tone: "Well it looks like you kids have been having fun, but its time to say goodbye." Genma chucked Ukyo and ran off with Ranma as fast as he could. Once he was out the door, he grabbed the okonomiyaki cart he'd parked nearby and kept running.

Ukyo couldn't keep up and called out to them: "It'll be okay! Just don't give up!"

Ranma promised herself she wouldn't.

* * *

Ranma Saotome: Transgender Warrior

Chapter 1

* * *

Rain poured down on the Tendo household as two weary travelers approached it. Genma was too impatient to knock, and opened the door with one hand as he held Ranma over his shoulder with the other. He took in the scene before him: his old friend Soun Tendo and three girls he presumed to be Soun's daughters were looking at him in amazement. He dumped Ranma on the floor cleared his throat before speaking. "Greetings, Soun Tendo. I have brought Ranma to marry one of your daughters and continue the legacy of the Anything Goes School of Martial Arts."

The speech seemed to bring Soun back to his senses, and he ran up to shake Genma's hand. "Welcome back old friend! I knew you would honor the pledge you made to join our families." Ranma groaned and shakily got up. "And welcome to you my new son in law!" Soun rapturously hugged Ranma, but he felt something odd and stared at Ranma's chest where there appeared to be... breasts beneath her wet Chinese shirt.

"What is this?" exclaimed Soun as he recoiled in shock.

Nabiki poked at Ranma's chest. "They're breasts, dad. Ranma's a girl."

"Ranma... is... a... girl?" Soun fainted.

"Oh, my!" said Kasumi. "Help me get father onto the futon."

Soun came to soon later, and he looked up at Genma. "Please tell me what's going on old friend."

Genma sighed. "It is truly a dark tale Tendo. Let us retire and discuss the matter over sake and shogi."

After the two men departed, Akane turned to Ranma and said, "Well I'm glad you're a girl. My name's Akane Tendo. Lets be friends!"

Ranma brightened up and said, "Okay."

"Great, let me show you the dojo." Akane lead Ranma, and spoke as she walked. "You study Kempo right?"

"Yeah, a little."

"Well then let's spar." Akane assumed a fighting stance, but Ranma just stood still with her hands behind her back; when Akane lunged forward, Ranma just quickly stepped aside. Akane looked confused for a moment, and then redoubled her assault.

Ranma felt comfortable for the first time since she'd gotten back to Japan. Practice always let her escape from the messy problems in her life to concentrate on the purity and elegance of the art. She smiled as she continued to dodge Akane's attacks. The girl had a lot of spirit but telegraphed her moves by sticking to rigid forms; she was a natural rebel who'd realize her potential if she stopped clinging to tradition. Akane wound up for a final punch, and Ranma flipped over her head leaving Akane to punch a hole in the wall; she playfully tapped Akane on the head.

Akane turned around and said, "You're really good! I'm glad you're a girl because I couldn't take being beaten by a boy."

Ranma frowned. "Why's that?"

"It's because boys are all a bunch of stupid jerks who only care about trying to date you!" Akane said with an edge in her voice.

"Oh." The peace Ranma had felt while she was sparing evaporated. "Let's go back inside."

When they got back, Kasumi led Ranma to her room and suggested she take a bath. Ranma agreed, and soon was soaking in the warm water of the tub.

She ran her hands along her body and felt all the changes that a year on hormones had given her. Softer skin came first, then her weight started shifting to the lower half of her body, then she'd started developing her own breasts! Ranma assessed them critically: they were still small enough that her baggy shirt could almost hide them entirely; that had kept her father from noticing until a week ago.

Genma sure had been surprised a week ago when he'd pulled off her shirt while cheerily shouting, "Laundry time!" After that he found her hormones and took them away. The next day he told Ranma about the fiancée thing and dragged her to Japan. It had been a week since she'd had hormones, and it was starting to drive her crazy. She dried herself off assessed herself in the mirror: pretty good, and she sure wasn't going to let herself slide back to where she'd been a year ago.

Suddenly, Ranma's reverie was interrupted as the door opened, and Akane walked in. She was as just naked as Ranma, and she looked... down there. Akane closed the door, and Ranma was too stunned to do anything for a moment. Then she threw on her clothes, and raced downstairs just as Akane started screaming.

"It's a... a... pervert!" Akane didn't know quite what else to say as she pointed her finger at Ranma.

"No wait! I can explain!"

"You're a man!"

"Shut up! No I'm not! Just listen to me!"

By now everyone else in the house was there, and Genma stepped in front of the two teens. "Yes, it is time for everything to be explained. I have already consulted with Tendo, and he has agreed not to hold Ranma's youthful experimentation against him. After all, we both did a lot of crazy stuff ourselves back in the day -didn't we Tendo?"

"We sure did Saotome," chuckled Soun.

The group sat around the Tendo dining room table, and Genma gave Ranma a severe look. "Now my boy, tell everyone here about the unfortunate mistakes you made that has led to all this confusion."

Ranma sighed, and began her story.

* * *

Ranma shouldered off her pack and took in the sight before her: over a hundred small ponds, and each had at least one bamboo pole stuck in them. Mist coming down off the mountains gave the place an ethereal, haunted quality as the sun set. She shivered and turned to the tour guide, a round little man with a cheerful face.

"Welcome to Jusenkyo, the training ground of over one hundred cursed springs. Legend says that the spirits of the people and animals who drowned here will impart their form on any who touch its waters."

Genma yawned. "I'd skip the story and just start training if I wasn't so tired from the trip up here. There any truth to those legends?"

"Not to my knowledge," answered the tour guide as he bent down to gently tap the surface of a pond. "The magic to transform one's body is not so easy to come by in these times."

Ranma eyed her father and chose her words carefully. "You said there are supposed to be human spirits here. What did they do?"

"There are many legends of such transformations: tales of springs that could grant youth, beauty, or strength. There are even tales of a spring that changed women into men and tales of one that changed men into women." The guide sensed Ranma's interest and gestured to a small, still pond. "That one, Nyannichuan."

Genma huffed, "Well we certainly aren't interested in any of that. Come on Ranma. Let's make camp and go to bed so we get an early start training tomorrow."

Sleep wouldn't come for Ranma. She slipped out of her bedroll, crept away from her snoring father, and made her way back to Nyannichuan. She stared into its waters, illuminated by the moonlight. Maybe, just maybe, if she prayed to the spirits with all her might... she plunged herself into the water and came back to the surface unchanged.

"There are many others who have done as you have done," commented the guide as he announced his presence.

Ranma pulled herself out of the pond as sputtered: "It was just a mistake! I was, uh... sleepwalking! Please don't tell Pop!"

The guide shook his head, "I do not reveal the identities of any who seek out Jusenkyo, but I do try to help when I can. Follow me." He lead Ranma back to his hut and offered her a seat at his small table. After rummaging for a bit, he took a seat himself and put a small plastic pill-bottle on the table. "Most people believe the barrier between man and woman can only be surmounted with magic, but there are other ways."

"You want to give me... sex hormones?"

"No, the bottle's empty, but it was filled by a doctor in town I know. I can arrange for you to see him, have him check your current hormone levels, and give you an appropriate prescription."

"I don't have any money."

"Send me what you think is appropriate once you have some."

"I... I don't know if I'm really a girl. I used to dress up when I was a kid, and I still think about that kind of stuff all the time. I can't imagine myself being with a girl as a guy, but I don't know if I could be with a guy as a girl or with a girl as a girl or..." Ranma trailed off and was silent for a while. "Pop and Mom would kill me -maybe literally."

"And yet, you entered Nyannichuan."

"Yeah, I always thought about how cool it would be if I could magically change. I thought about it being an accident too, like a curse. That way nobody would blame me for it, and I could just say, 'Oh well, I'm forced to be a girl. Might as well make the best of it by getting dressed up all girly-girl to seduce guys...'" Ranma blushed and looked away.

"I had a friend when I was a kid. She's the only one I've ever known who made me think I could be a girl. She told me not to give up, but I don't know about taking hormones. I don't know if I could live with being... 'in-between' for years while they changed me. I'd be half boy and half girl. I'd be a freak."

"It is a hard path, and some will mock and vilify you for walking it. The choice is entirely yours."

"Well hey, I can take anything. I'm Ranma Saotome! I mean... I'm going to meet Ucchan again someday, and I don't want to let her down... or let him down. I've never backed down from a fight before and I'm not going to now!"

"The first fight is to find the truth within yourself. Do you want this?"

"I... I mean it's dumb, but what the hell? Most everyone has dumb stuff that makes them happy. Sure, I want it, and I'll do what it takes."

The guide nodded. "I'll make an appointment for tomorrow afternoon if you can make it then."

"Well Pop will probably want me to train all day, but I can dodge him. I've been dodging that old man my whole life. It'll be no sweat. Piece of cake." Ranma stood up and quickly bowed to the guide. "Well thanks a lot for your help. I promise I'll pay you back when I can. Have a good night!" Ranma strode back to camp, lay down, and fell asleep instantly.

* * *

"The guy was really nice. I got a year's worth of hormones and managed to hide them from Pop. I was almost out by the time he noticed."

"It is a betrayal that would shock any father," said Genma sternly, "but my timely intervention will allow your body to return to its natural state. How could you refuse to embrace your manhood when it will grant you one of Tendo's fine daughters as your wife?"

"You've got to be kidding!" sputtered Nabiki. "You expect one of us to marry her?"

"One of you will marry HIM," corrected Tendo. "Well Ranma, what do you think? There's Kasumi, my eldest, age 19; Nabiki, my middle daughter, age 17; and Akane, my youngest, age 16."

"I think Akane would be best," Kasumi said hurriedly. "She and Ranma already have made friends because they both like martial arts."

"Yeah, and Akane hates boys so Ranma's perfect for her," added Nabiki.

"Wait a minute! I'm not marrying any pervert!" protested Akane.

"I told you to stop calling me that!" yelled Ranma, and they both rose to their feet.

"Look at that," said Soun. "They're acting like a couple already. This settles it: Akane will marry Ranma."

"I won't do it Dad!" said Akane. "I don't want to even look at this... wannabe girl."

"You're one to talk. I saw those thighs of yours when we were in the bathroom, and I'm the one with a girlish figure."

SMACK!

Akane stalked up to her room leaving Ranma lying underneath what was left of the dining room table. Kasumi started to clean up the mess, and the men went back to their game of Shogi. Nabiki shook her head as she looked at the dazed girl on the floor. "Things are going to get a lot more interesting around here."

* * *

Author's notes:

Hi there, I'm transgender.

When I got into Ranma as a teenager, I loved the idea of a hero with a "curse" that magically changed their sex. I was to scared to even think about hormones and surgery back then, and Ranma let me dream about being a girl without having to admit that was something I wanted. I'm 27 now, and I've spent a lot of time in the intervening years dealing with those fears. I decided to write this fic because I wanted to see Ranma go through the same challenges transgender people go through in the real world and still be a hero. If you're offended, take a step back and think about the wide variety of takes on Ranma you've seen in fanfic; everyone has their own Ranma, and mine's a transgender warrior.

One last thing: thanks to my beta reader, SoulCry.


	2. Chapter 2

Ranma Saotome: Trangender Warrior

Chapter 2

* * *

Dawn broke on an autumn morning in Nerima. Kasumi started breakfast, Akane went for a jog, and Ranma faced off against her father in a sparring match. "You're getting slow old man!" she taunted in-between jabs.

"Quick enough to knock you out last night," Genma replied and pivoted for a roundhouse kick.

Ranma backflipped to dodge. "You hit me with a stop sign when my back was turned!"

"A true martial artist never lets down his guard. -Ow!" He winced from the punch Ranma had landed on his solar plexus.

Ranma laughed and pressed the attack. She complained about her father's dirty tricks all the time, but she had to admit it kept their matches interesting. Beneath the petty rivalry, she appreciated her father passing on everything he knew. She suddenly wondered if that might be part of the reason he wanted her to get married; what other incentive would she have to stick around once Pop ran out of things to teach her? Well the old man didn't have to worry about that; she'd be happy to kick his ass any day... if he still was okay with her once she finished transitioning.

"Breakfast is ready!" called Kasumi.

Genma beat Ranma to the table and used the lead to start shoving food in his mouth as fast as he could. Ranma quickly made up for lost time, as the Tendos watched in amazement.

"Very ladylike table manners you've got there, Ranma," Nabiki said as she poured herself some coffee.

Ranma froze for a second, but then retorted, "I'd have starved long ago if I didn't eat fast enough to keep up with this old man. I need the food to grow on, but everything he eats goes to his big gut."

"We both have a man's appetite for the man's work of martial arts," said Genma as he finished the last remaining morsel. "I wouldn't have it any other way."

"I don't wanna have a big argument again," said Ranma as she got up and started heading upstairs. "We had enough of that last night."

"Where do you think you're going?" asked Genma. "Today's your first day of school."

"Fine. I'm glad to have a chance to get out of the house for a while."

Akane grabbed her bag and said, "I'm ready to leave now. Let's go together, Nabiki."

"I don't think so sis. Ranma is your fiancé, so you make sure she... I mean make sure HE gets to Furinkan."

"And remember that he's going to be going there as a boy," added Genma. "Have you got that Ranma?"

"Yes, Pop."

"Say it like a man!"

Ranma dropped her voice a few octaves and bellowed, "Yes sir!" like an army cadet.

Soon she was on her way to school, and Akane asked, "How'd you do that with your voice?"

Ranma grinned and shifted her voice from male to female in a single sentence. "I used to sound more like this, but I practiced to bring the pitch and resonance up to sound like this."

"When did you find time to do it if you were training with your father all the time?"

"Well, I mostly practiced while I was alone doing my katas. I said each move I did it, and I worked to get my speech to flow just as naturally as my form. It was actually kinda cool; I felt like a wuxia hero calling out everything I was doing. A lot of the words were Chinese that I didn't understand, but each one seemed to fit its kata perfectly."

Ranma was lost in thought, and Akane watched her silently until they reached Furinkan. As they passed through the gates she assumed a battle stance to prepare for the onslaught she knew would come.

"Hey what's going on?" asked Ranma, as she saw a horde of male students dressed in a wide assortment of sporting gear charge towards Akane.

"This happens every morning," muttered Akane, and she dove into the fray.

Ranma hopped up onto the wall at the school's entrance to watch the melee. Akane moved with much more confidence and grace than Ranma had seen in the dojo last night; it was a wild street brawl against impossible odds, so she forgot about all the rules she'd been taught and just followed her instincts. Her moves might not be pretty, but they sure got the job done.

Just as the last unfortunate student hit the ground, a tall young man wearing kendo robes stepped into view. From the way he moved, Ranma expected him to be in a different class than the chumps Akane had already beaten; but she stopped respecting the guy as soon as he opened his mouth.

"Weak suitors beaten. Warrior maiden's triumph. But true love approaches."

"Huh?" said Akane.

"Haiku," replied Kuno.

"You have six syllables in the last bit," said Ranma.

"Nitpicking critic! Those who challenge the poetry of Tatewaki Kuno would do well to compose their own epitaph! I am Blue Thunder! Furikan Kendo Champion! Seventeen years old!"

"Too long in the middle this time," said Ranma as she counted on her fingers.

Akane started circling Kuno. "I can handle him myself, Ranma. Don't get in the way."

"Yes, who are you to interfere in our affairs?"

"Glad to tell you." Ranma hopped down and gave Kuno a confident grin. "My name's Ranma Saotome, and I'm staying at Akane's place."

"Jackal!" Kuno surged forward with a quick upward slash that caught Ranma off guard. She jumped up and over Kuno's head in time to have save her belly, but she wasn't fast enough to save her shirt. It sailed off her and landed on Kuno's head as he gaped at her.

"What blessing is this? Something within me hardens. I must know this girl."

Ranma took advantage of Kuno's bewilderment to grab her shirt and inspect the damage. "What's the big idea, you idiot?"

"Oh vision of loveliness, I beg your forgiveness. I mistook you for a boy who rivaled me for Akane's affections." Kuno bowed low, but he couldn't tear his eyes from Ranma's chest.

"Well yeah, I'm a girl, and I don't care who knows..." Ranma looked back at the school and saw nearly the entire student body at the windows jostling for a better view. "I hope Pop doesn't hear about this."

"The whole world's going to know about this, Ranma!" shouted Akane. "What were you doing out there? You don't know Kuno. You don't know this school. So when I tell you I've got things under control why don't you listen to me?"

"Uh..." Ranma backed away as she put her shirt back on and held it closed. "I was just trying to help."

"Well, I didn't ask for your help, and I don't want it! Go get a shirt from the gym, and I'll see you in class." Akane stormed off.

"Maiden departing..." began Kuno.

"Oh skip it!" yelled Ranma, and she ran off. Some first day this was turning out to be.

She eventually found the gym, asked the teacher for a shirt, and went to the bathroom to put it on. It looked okay, and certainly showed her figure better than the baggy Chinese shirt, but was it good enough to pass as a girl? Kuno had thought she was a boy when he first saw her, so what if someone else guessed that she used to be a guy after getting a close look at her? She wished she could be wearing a dress like the other girls, and some makeup would probably help too...

She took a deep breath and assumed the neutral stance. She had to go back or everyone would think she was a coward. No way that was going to happen if her name was Ranma Saotome. She was feeling so pumped up and ready for battle that she was almost happy when she turned a corner and ran into Kuno.

"Blue Thunder returns. Prepare thyself Saotome. Time for a duel!"

"You were too short on the last part this time Kuno."

"I say it 'du-el', two syllabels," replied Kuno as he lunged forward with a flurry of thrusts. This time, he didn't sound annoyed at all, and he smiled as he continued his attack.

Ranma dodged without too much trouble and studied Kuno's technique. It was very formal and traditional; all his moves had been around for at least a hundred years. Still, there was a reason those old moves were still around, and Kuno executed them flawlessly. The thing she couldn't figure out was why Kuno made such conservative attacks. Even if he connected, he'd give her a bruise at best. Then it finally dawned on Ranma: Kuno was going easy on her.

"What are you holding back for?"

"I fight with all the strength in my soul."

"No you aren't!"

"I swear I..." Ranma let one of Kuno's weak thrusts hit her left arm so she could dart in and deliver a knockout punch her right.

Ranma shook her head. "What an idiot." Then she noticed that she'd drawn a crowd again by fighting her way through the halls of Furikan high.

She could hear people mumbling that she was "that babe who flashed her boobs," and spotted Akane in the crowd looking even more furious than before. She was already carrying a bucket as punishment for being late, and Ranma was given one of her own.

The stood quietly for a few minutes till Ranma broke the silence. "So why does Kuno keep bugging you?"

"He got it into his head that if he beats me in combat I have to date him, and then he got every stupid boy in every stupid club in this school to believe the same thing; that's why they all attack me every morning."

"Just to date you? All the girls in this school must be dogs to make those guys so desperate. -Yow!" Akane had swung her bucket and clobbered Ranma in the head. "What did you do that for? You're such a violent tomboy!"

"Tomboy? I don't have to take that from a perverted boy who pretends to be a girl!"

Ranma reeled back more than she had when Akane hit her. Then she turned around, folded her arms, and said, "Don't talk to me," in a cold voice. It took all of her training not to move, not to think, and especially not to feel anything as she stood there. Eventually the class ended, and they got through the rest of the day without speaking to each other.

Ranma tried meditating when she got back, but she just couldn't empty her mind. Instead, she grabbed some chips and zoned out watching TV. Just before dinner, Nabiki came home and handed Ranma a letter written in calligraphy.

"It comes from Kuno," she explained.

Ranma opened it, and it simply said: "Ranma Saotome, I bid thee to meet me at sunset in the place we first met. -Tatewaki Kuno."

"Looks like a challenge," said Ranma. She knew how to deal with that -unlike most of the other problems in her life. She ran back to school after dinner.

The last rays of light were disappearing under the horizon when Kuno walked into view.

"The sun is setting. A maiden awaits her fate. Blue Thunder draws near."

"Where's your bokken, Kuno?"

"I have no need for it tonight."

"That's pretty arrogant considering you lost this morning."

"Our battle only confirmed you are as fierce as you are beautiful, and that makes you as rare and glorious a flower of maidenhood as Akane." He threw something at Ranma, and she reflexively caught it. "Accept these roses, Ranma Saotome. I love you." He gave a smile and walked away without saying another word.

Ranma's first impulse was to throw the bouquet away and shout something at Kuno as he left, but she just couldn't bring herself to do it. She walked back to the Tendo household, got a vase for the roses, and went to bed.

Sleep didn't come easily, and even in dreams Ranma couldn't escape from Kuno. She ran through an endless maze of halls in Furikan High School, and he was around every corner offering roses and saying, "I love you." She jumped out a window and fell through an endless void swirling with rose petals. The fall ended in the Tendo's koi pond, but it was impossibly deep, and she couldn't swim back the surface. Her clothes had disappeared, and a naked quartet of Kunos swirled around her saying, "I love you." She was curled in a ball to protect herself, but she knew as they came closer and closer she'd uncurl and Kuno would see... everything. She awoke in a cold sweat and panting for breath.

Just as she was calming down, she noticed that part of her body wasn't calm at all. It hadn't happened since she got on hormones a year ago, and it meant her testosterone was reasserting itself. On the way to the bathroom, she told herself over and over that it used to happen after all sorts of weird dreams that had nothing to do with men proclaiming their love to her. She undressed, poured cold water over herself, and shivered as she dried off and put her clothes back on.

It was still at least an hour before dawn, so she went down to the dojo to practice on her own. She let her mind pick a kata that felt right, one that could let her express what she was feeling, and she flew into one of the fastest and most aggressive she knew. It was Muay Thai style: all quick strikes with hands, shins, elbows, and knees. She whirled through the kata shouting out each move as she went. This was a dance that would take her through a crowd of opponents, but her technique was much more deadly than Akane had been yesterday. After going through the kata twice, she moved to the acrobatic Wu-Shu and finished with an elegant Tai Chi Chuan. Once she was done, she had an answer that she didn't even know she was looking for. Ranma knew she needed to ask for help.

"That was nice," Akane said simply. For all Ranma knew, she could have been watching the whole time.

"Thanks, I've got something I need to ask you. I need to get hormones, estrogen and stuff, so I can keep on transitioning. That way I'll be a girl and our parents will give up on trying to marry us. You know any doctors around here that could help?"

"Well... the only one I know is Dr. Tofu Ono. He mostly does massage, acupuncture, and stuff with herbs."

"That's okay, he doesn't need to be a specialist. I just someone to write a prescription. Let's go."

"Right now? Before breakfast?"

"Yeah, I don't wanna make us late for school again."

"All right, sorry for yesterday by the way. I didn't mean what I said."

"Its okay, I didn't either."

They quickly changed into school clothes and left for Dr. Tofu's Clinic. The silence felt awkward, so Akane asked Ranma, "When do you like to use those moves you were doing back there in a real match?" and that was enough to keep Ranma chatting about the pros and cons of each style till they arrived.

They were the first customers of the day, and after Akane made the introductions, Ranma said, "I'm going from being a boy to being a girl. Up until a week ago, I was taking 200 milligrams of spironolactone and 6 milligrams of estradiol each day. Could you write me a prescription for some more?"

Dr. Tofu didn't bat an eye. "I haven't treated any transgender patients before, but I do see many elderly women who use those drugs." Ranma talked about the tests she'd gotten when she began, and they discussed symptoms of possible side effects for a few minutes. Then Dr. Tofu wrote out a prescription for a 3 month supply, gave directions to the nearest pharmacies, and held up his skeleton "Betty" to make it wave goodbye as they left.

"I can't believe how easy that was," said Akane.

"Yeah, but now comes the tough part." They swung by a pharmacy and found it would cost 9000 yen for a one month prescription. Ranma had less that 500.

"Nabiki probably has that much or could figure out a way to get it," offered Akane. "She's handled the family finances since she was nine."

"Will she help if she knows what it's for?"

"She'd better. I'm still mad at her for pushing me into getting engaged with you. -Oh I, uh..."

"Its okay, I get it," said Ranma with a smile.

They'd spent so little time at Dr. Tofu's that they got to school before the morning gauntlet had even begun to form. "Wow, this sure is different," said Ranma as she hopped up on a tree.

Akane nodded. "We need to figure out how to get Kuno off our backs."

"Well I could fight him this morning..."

"That wouldn't solve anything," Akane snapped. "Remember that this is OUR problem, and I'm not just here for you to rescue." She took a deep breath and began again. "He likes it when we fight him because it shows we're spirited or whatever."

"Yeah, and he holds back against us -or at least he did against me."

Akane nodded. "It's because we're girls. He doesn't respect us. He's just a stupid pig who thinks women are prizes for men to win. As long as we're single he'll treat us as fair game."

"So you mean we have to get... not-single with someone?"

Akane giggled. "That's what he has to think. I've got an idea."

Some time later, the daily mob gathered as usual and sat around chatting about their chances today. Kuno arrived last and stayed apart from the rest practicing his forms. A few minutes before the final bell rang, Akane and a mysterious figure called out to the crowd from the school's roof.

"Hello, Kuno! I'm sorry to tell you that this amazing martial artist has captured my heart. Ranma loves him too, so you'll have to go through this guy before you can get to us. Sorry!"

"What man dares stand between Kuno and his love?"

"I do! I am Master Happosai!" said Ranma in her boy-voice. She got the name from someone Pop mumbled about in his sleep a while back, and there was no way Kuno would have ever heard of him. "I am such a man among men that I deserve to have both girls all for myself. Ha! Ha! Ha!" The fake mustache on her lip itched, and the red felt curtain she'd draped around herself was really awkward. She hoped she could get this over quickly and return this stuff to the theatre department's closet.

"You rogue! Prepare to meet thy death!" Kuno looked like he was ready to try charging up the building.

"I will meet any challenger on this field once your school has dismissed! The losers of this manly battle will forfeit the right to compete for me and... they won't be able to compete WITH me for Ranma and Akane," she finished hurriedly. The pair fled back into the school, hid the costume, and got to class just before final bell.

At lunch that day, Ranma bought enough to fill her up for the coming battle with the last of her money. Akane found Nabiki and let her in on the plan.

"Everyone's talking about the fight this afternoon and placing bets, but none of them realize he'll be fighting someone he just lost against yesterday. Put some money on Ranma, and give us half of what you make."

"I already knew that 'Happosai' was Ranma," countered Nabiki with a smile. "I've already heard her boy voice, and that ridiculous disguise couldn't fool anyone but Kuno and the dumb jocks who follow him. I'm also not convinced betting on Ranma is a sure thing."

"I won't lose," insisted Ranma. "I really need 9,000 yen for hormones. Just give me that much if I win, and I'll cover your losses if I lose."

"Done," said Nabiki and shook Ranma's hand. She started working the room for bets, and soon had a crowd of students around her waving money and arguing over odds.

Akane shook her head. "Do you realize how much money is going to be riding on this match? You'll owe at least 100,000 if you lose! Nabiki just effectively took about 1 to 10 odds on Kuno."

"All that matters is everything will be okay after I win," said Ranma. "Kuno doesn't have a one in a million shot of beating me."

Once school finally ended, Ranma put her disguise back on and leapt into the circle of students gathered outside. Kuno was pacing furiously, but stopped and raised his bokken to acknowledge Ranma's enterence. "Challenger arrives. Battle for the Maiden's heart. True love prevails."

"Short on the last part again," said Ranma, and Kuno gave her an odd look. "For I have heard Akane Tendo speak of your poetry, and it always stinks. Let's fight!"

Kuno charged and the battle was on. He fought like an entirely different man from yesterday; each powerful swing and thrust would kill if it struck true. Ranma could still dodge him though, and she danced around looking for an opening. Then she tripped on the curtain she wore and Kuno siezed the advantage with a downward slice. She rolled out of the way just in time, but the force of the swing opened a shallow gash in her side and shredded the curtain.

Ranma scrambled to her feat and heard Akane shout: "Your moustache!" Ranma felt her lip and confirmed it had come off. She whirled to just barely dodge another thrust from Kuno, as she held one arm to hide her face and the other to hide the telltale bumps on her chest. This was not going well.

Ranma backpedaled to buy some time. She had to beat Kuno without using her arms or by striking while he couldn't see her. Neither option sounded easy to pull off. Kuno charged again, and Ranma realized she'd backed up to the circle of students and needed to get out of there before a bystander got hurt. She surprised Kuno by running towards him, rolling under his swing, and using momentum to summersault past him to the center of the ring. She was a bit bruised up from the rocky earth but otherwise okay.

Acrobatics had to be the key to winning here. Kuno's traditional style only anticipated opponents who fought with both feet on the ground. She let Kuno come at her again, backflipped to a handstand, and then threw herself back at him feet first to deliver a storm of kicks. Kuno collapsed and the fight was over.

Later that day after Ranma had enjoyed a bath and taken her hormones, she sat down to dinner with the Tendos. She focused on eating as quickly and as politely as possible by keeping her chopsticks a constant blur of motion. That earned a smile from Nabiki, and while she ate Kasumi commented on the roses that had shown up last night. "Those came from a guy at school who likes Akane. I beat him up," explained Ranma.

"Well done, my boy!" said Genma in-between mouthfuls. "You're becoming more of a man every day."

Suddenly, Ranma had lost her appetite.

* * *

Thanks again to my beta reader SoulCry.


	3. Chapter 3

Ranma Saotome: Transgender Warrior

Chapter 3

* * *

Ranma sat in a full lotus position as she surveyed the kaleidoscope of foundation, eyeshadow, eyeliner, mascara, blush, and lipstick before her. Confident that everything was in place, she took a brush in each hand and furiously began putting on the makeup. Once Kasumi had explained the overall goal was balance and harmony, she could approach the task as a martial art, and she already felt close to mastering it. She gave herself one last look in the mirror, nodded in satisfaction, and carefully put everything away.

Kasumi was just setting out breakfast as Ranma came downstairs. They exchanged good mornings, and Ranma asked, "Any word from Pop or your dad?"

"They just called again last evening to ask if any underwear had gone missing. I can't understand why that's so important."

It was a mystery to all of them. Soun had just been reading the paper one morning as he always did when his face suddenly paled, and he ran to find Genma. After a short whispered conversation, the two announced they were leaving on a training trip, and left less than ten minutes later.

"You've got to admit the house has been a lot calmer this past month," remarked Nabiki, "and just look at Ranma; do you really want daddy to make Akane marry her?"

"Hey! What do you mean by that?" shouted Ranma.

"I mean, we'd all probably be happier if Akane married someone who didn't look so nice in that girl's uniform. It was a compliment."

Ranma grumbled anyway, and Kasumi concluded, "I guess that he... SHE is happier as a girl, so I suppose marrying Akane wasn't meant to be."

"Not to mention the fact that I don't want to marry anyone," said Akane. "Come on, Ranma, let's go."

As the two girls walked to school, Ranma complained about Nabiki and Kasumi while Akane defended them. Despite the bickering, they were both careful not to let things escalate. The argument was winding down as they reached Furinkan and heard someone yelling, "Ranma Saotome! Where is Ranma Saotome?"

An oddly dressed teenage boy was the cause of the disturbance at the school entrance. He was dressed in rugged green and yellow clothes, wore a huge backpack with a bamboo umbrella atop it, and had a yellow and black bandanna in his hair. He had a desperate and frantic look in his eyes as he asked each student if they'd seen Ranma Saotome, and they all rushed past without answering. His eyes went wide as his gaze turned to Ranma and looked like a man who found water after weeks of wandering in the desert. "You! You're Ranma Saotome aren't you!"

"Um... yeah. Who wants to know?"

The boy looked thunderstruck. "How could you have forgotten me?"

"Well I've met a lot of people. Could you give me a hint?"

"I am the man you spurned and fled! Because of you I have known hell these past six years!"

"Let's see... six years ago I was at an all boys junior high." She noticed that a crowd of students was watching the confrontation. "I mean I met all the boys I knew at that school -which I did not attend because I'm a girl."

"Liar!" shouted the boy. He shouldered off his backpack and drew his umbrella. "Don't pretend you don't remember what happened between us, Ranma!"

"Bread!" shouted Ranma suddenly. "You're the bread boy! We used to fight to get the last slice of bread at the cafeteria every day! If you're still upset about that, I'll buy a few loaves for you."

"The feud between us has gone much farther than bread, Ranma. What you've done to me can only be paid for with your life!"

The boy charged and swung his umbrella at Ranma in a downward arc. She dodged aside, and the impact of the attack left a crater in the concrete. Just then, the final bell for classes rang, so Ranma said, "Gotta go," and sprinted into the school. When she got to homeroom, she saw she'd lost the strange boy.

Akane joined her and asked, "What did you do to make that guy so angry?"

"I don't know; all I can remember was the bread thing."

"Well he didn't seem fazed to see you as a girl. How many guys in school knew about that?"

Everything clicked together in Ranma's head. "Just one..."

* * *

Two ten year old kids in matching school uniforms marched purposefully down the street with a dog at the head of the procession. "Why do we have to follow this dog to get to your house?" asked Ranma.

"We just do," growled Ryoga. "Shirokuro knows where she's going."

"All right, well are you sure your parents won't be home when we get there?"

"Well they might be back, but they've been gone for a few months now, so it isn't likely."

"A few months! Shouldn't you call the police or something?"

"Nah, they get lost all the time. Hey, why have we stopped?"

"Well the dog stopped at this house; is it yours?"

"Oh yeah! Good girl, Shirokuro! Come inside."

Ranma followed Ryoga and looked around in amazement. There were bite marks on all the door knobs as if they were regularly opened by Shirokuro, and the rest of the furniture showed the marks of being used by the canine just as often. Despite this, the house was spotlessly clean, and the kitchen was well stocked with food for humans and dogs alike.

"All right," said Ryoga, "you said we could spar when we got here, so let's do it!" Shirokuro barked, and Ryoga said, "Oh yeah, there's no fighting in the house. Let's go to the empty lot out back." After heading for the door he'd just come from, Shirokuro guided them to the lot through the back door.

The two kids practiced their moves on one another all afternoon. Ryoga was the toughest kid Ranma had ever fought that was her own age, and she appreciated the challenge. Ryoga certainly was strong, but his technique was very basic. He was too stubborn to try something new until getting beaten with the same trick a few times in a row. Still, Ranma recognized he had a real warrior's spirit and was just as dedicated to the art as she was. He improved as the day wore on, and his boundless endurance let him score some hits as Ranma got tired. She winced at each blow, and told herself she'd never let the fight go on this long in a real match.

They quit once it got too dark to see, and Ranma asked, "Could I stay over your house tonight?"

"I guess so," said Ryoga. They went back inside to find dinner had already been laid out, and Ranma called her dad once they were done eating.

After Ranma finished marveling at seeing Shirokuro put the dishes in the sink, she said, "Why don't we go play in your mom's room."

"What do you wanna do there?"

"Just dress up and stuff."

"What fun is that?"

"Ummm... it's good to know how to disguise yourself -like a ninja!"

Ryoga agreed to that, and they had Shirokuro show them to the room. Ranma dived into the makeup while Ryoga looked on in confusion. "You aren't disguising yourself. You just look weird."

"Just you wait!" said Ranma defiantly. She put a shawl over her head and used a long shirt as a dress. "What do you think now?"

"Wow, I'd have never known it was you," said Ryoga in appreciation.

"Thanks, do you think I look cute?"

"Oh I dunno, uh..." Ryogo started to feel uncomfortable as Ranma approached him with a strange look in her eye.

"I'm a ninja and disguised myself to infiltrate the enemy base. I've got to seduce the sentry to get into the general's chambers. He thinks I'm cute and lets his guard down."

"Ranma, what are you doing?" said Ryoga in a panic.

She cuddled up to him and whispered, "Do you think I'm cute?"

"I don't know!"

"Just say yes."

"Yes?"

"Thanks," Ranma gave Ryoga a peck on the cheek and backed off smiling.

Ryoga just stared for a few seconds as trickle of blood came from his nose, and without warning he yelled at the top of his lungs and launched himself at Ranma with a jump kick. It caught her off guard, and the impact sent her flying into the wall. She got up just in time to dodge a punch and beat a hasty retreat out of the room.

"Calm down Ryoga! I'm sorry!" said Ranma as she stumbled downstairs. Shirokuro was barking loudly, but Ranma ignored her as she ran out the front door with Ryoga in hot pursuit. After running for what seemed like hours, Ranma managed to lose him. She tossed the shirt and scarf in a dumpster, used the water in a puddle to wipe the makeup off her face, and trudged home.

* * *

"Ranma, how could you do that to Ryoga?" asked Akane. They were at lunch now where Ranma had finally given her the full story.

"Why are you taking his side? I was just a kid fooling around."

"You just don't kiss a boy like that."

"Well I'm sorry, but I never got taught the rules," Ranma said bitterly. "How would you like to go your whole life without anyone saying you're cute?"

Akane paused for a moment before responding. "It wasn't Ryoga's fault you were unhappy, and it looks like what you did really hurt him."

"That jump kick hurt ME! We should have been even after that. -Oh no, not again," Ranma sighed as she heard Ryoga calling her name from across the room.

"Die, Ranma!" shouted Ryoga as he leapt from one table to the next scattering food as he went. He swung his umbrella at Ranma's table and demolished it as he landed. Ranma had escaped the blow, but she still got hit with the mystery meat, stale rice, overcooked veggies, and other splattering lunch food.

"Look, Ryoga, I'm sorry," said Ranma as she dodged attacks that sent more tables and food flying everywhere. "Do you hear what I'm saying? I AM SORRY I KISSED YOU! It was six years ago, so could you get over it already?"

"The nightmare of that moment hasn't ended for me, Ranma! I never found my way home after chasing you that night. I haven't seen Shirokuro, my parents, or my home in six years! I've wandered the earth a lost soul with only the thought of revenge to keep me going!"

The cafeteria was pretty thoroughly destroyed by this point, and the martial artists circled each other in the detritus of splintered tables painted with the remains of a hundred lunches. "I'm sorry you got lost, Ryoga. That must have been tough for a kid. Couldn't you have called for a taxi or something?"

"Oh yeah... but I could not bear showing my face to the world for it to see my shame! I was branded an outcast, and I knew none would grant me aid or shelter!"

"What are you talking about?" asked Ranma, but at that moment Ryoga grabbed a chunk of a table and threw it at her. She ducked, but it smashed into the wall narrowly missing several students huddled in terror.

_I've got to move the fight out of here_, thought Ranma and countered Ryoga's next punch with a judo throw that hurtled him into the kitchen. Ranma followed cautiously and scanned the haze of steam and smoke for her opponent. Ryoga popped up holding three kitchen knives in each hand and threw them at Ranma. Her shoulder was nicked by one of them, and she muttered, "Alright, Ryoga, I'll give you a fight." She grabbed a pot in each hand and smashed Ryoga's head in-between them. Amazingly, he recovered quickly enough from the blow to hit Ranma in her stomach with his umbrella.

Ranma stumbled back gasping for breath as her vision blurred. She tumbled to the side on pure instinct and heard Ryoga's umbrella clang on something right behind her. She stayed low and rolled under tables to keep away from Ryoga long enough to recover. The air was cleaner near the floor, and as her senses cleared, she became aware of a hissing sound. She rose, and the smell of rotting eggs confirmed her suspicions. "Ryoga, it's a gas leak! We've got to get out of here!"

In response, her adversary moved to cover the door. "It is fitting that we both die in this battle, Ranma!"

"But what about everyone else in this school? Hundreds of kids could die!"

He hesitated and then nodded, "Fine, we'll finish this another day." They both left the kitchen and helped the rest of the students in the cafeteria to get out. Ryoga himself ended up carrying out a boy who'd twisted an ankle. There was no more drama and no explosions because the gas got turned off in time. By then, Ryoga was long gone.

Once the excitement had died down, Ranma realized she was still covered in cafeteria food. "Ryoga, I'll get you for this, even if it's the last thing I do," she muttered as she drew stares walking back home.

She tossed her clothes in a trash bag, and spent an hour washing her body and hair. After that, she soaked in the tub to nurse her bruises until she picked up a voice from downstairs: Ryoga. She dashed out of the water, wrapped a towel around herself just in time to hear Akane say, "Why don't you get cleaned up in here?" She frantically looked for a place to hide and settled on leaping up to the ceiling. As Ryoga entered, she was supporting herself by her toes on the door frame and her fingertips on the light fixture. She did her best to look away as Ryoga stripped and quietly let herself down to slip out once he was busy cleaning himself and his back was turned.

Akane was waiting in the hall, and gasped when she saw Ranma emerge. "Did he see you?" she whispered.

"No! What's he doing here?" Ranma whispered back.

"I followed him after he left the school and saw him bust open a soda machine so he'd have something cold to put on his head. You gave him some nasty lumps."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I'll be careful not to hurt the next maniac who tries to kill me!"

"Keep your voice down! I told him that I knew what you'd done to him and that I'd bring you to our place since you'd be back here eventually. He seemed shocked that I'd be nice to him and couldn't stop saying 'thank you' as I brought him in."

"Of course he was surprised! No sane person would invite someone who just trashed a cafeteria and nearly blew up a school into their home!"

"He won't do that if he doesn't see you. Just stay out of sight until I can figure out why he's still so mad at you."

"Who cares? He's a psychopath."

"He's an honorable martial artist. He saved those people in the cafeteria."

"He saved them from the danger he put them in." muttered Ranma.

At that moment the bathroom door started to open and Ranma leapt behind it. "Oh, hi, Ryoga. Done so soon?" asked Akane.

He was only wearing a towel as he opened the door wide and squished Ranma against the wall in the process. "Yeah, I scrubbed my hair and stuff, but I figured these clothes are finished, so I'd just get a new set from my pack. I don't feel comfortable being naked if Ranma could come in here at any second."

"I don't think she'll be back for a while, but I'd be happy to take you to your pack. –It's down here."

The pair walked downstairs as Ranma peeled herself off the wall. She spent the rest of the afternoon sulking upstairs in her room while Akane chatted with Ryoga. They had dinner without her and she didn't get to eat until Kasumi brought up some cold leftovers. She even had to sleep in the attic because Akane was afraid Ryoga might wander around the house.

The next morning, she had to sneak into her own room to get dressed in a fresh girl's uniform and settle for leftovers again as she met Akane to go to school. "Tell me you have a plan to get rid of him." she said with an edge in her voice.

"It's really funny and really sad at the same time." mused Akane. "I finally got him to talk about it after dinner last night. He tells me that the reason he's still so angry is because, and I quote, you 'made him gay.'"

"That's unbelievably stupid -even for him."

"I know and I tried to explain things to him. He just said that once you're gay you can't go back no matter how much you'd like to. He said that being gay was particularly bad for him because you're the only guy he's ever liked."

"What?"

"He only liked you a little bit in that instant you kissed him. He thinks that one moment is enough to make him gay even though every other moment since then he's wanted to kill you."

"All right, what's the plan to knock some sense into his head?"

"I'm actually still working on that."

Ranma groaned and spent the rest of the day pondering the question herself. Every clever idea she had ran up against the wall of Ryoga's stupidity. She was still clueless after school and resigned herself to another dinner of leftovers. It started to rain that evening, as Ranma lay awake in the attic. She was about to fall asleep when she heard something downstairs. She rushed to the window and saw Ryoga sitting in the backyard under his umbrella. Curious, she crept onto the roof and was surprised to hear him start talking to himself. It must come from being alone so much.

"Oh Akane, words can't express the happiness I've felt this past day. You've taken me in despite knowing my shameful secret, and your kindness makes me believe I might someday recover from the horrible anguish I've lived with all these years. At the same time, I feel that anguish all the more intensely now that I'm here. I love you, Akane, and know I can never have you because... I'm gay."

A tile came loose, and Ranma slid off the roof landing right in front of Ryoga. "Come to laugh at your handiwork, have you?" shouted Ryoga as he closed his umbrella and started swinging. "Do you think it's funny that I've fallen in love? Are you proud to have dragged me down to your level? How many other innocent men have you turned gay?"

Ranma shivered in the rain as she dodged Ryoga's attacks; all she was wearing was a nightshirt. "You're not gay, Ryoga! You can't turn someone gay just by kissing them!"

"You lit a desire in my heart which has destroyed my life!" Ryoga spun his umbrella open to hit Ranma with a spray of water and took advantage of her surprise to land a solid blow to her left shoulder.

Ranma leapt up onto the yard's fence to retreat. She couldn't let this fight last long if she wanted to win it. Ryoga followed her up onto the fence and advanced on her with umbrella thrusts. Ranma grabbed the umbrella and delivered a kick to Ryoga's head. It didn't seem to faze him too much and he swung her off the umbrella into the qoi pond. Ranma scrambled out, dodged the leaping attack she knew was coming and used her position to roundhouse Ryoga into the pond. She kicked him in the head when he surfaced, again and again. As she waited for him to come up a fourth time his umbrella flew out of the pond, and she had to block it instead of dodging. It still felt like it almost did enough damage to break her arms, and the attack gave Ryoga more than enough time to surface and escape.

Ranma hefted the umbrella, but didn't feel she had enough strength left in her arms to swing it. The kicks to the head made Ryoga sway on his feet, but he still grinned as she struggled. "Heavy, isn't it?" Ranma set it over her good shoulder and watched Ryoga coldly. He continued, "I've carried that umbrella all across China looking for you, but that was a light burden compared to the one you gave me."

"I know you don't believe me, but I never meant to hurt you."

"Why else would you kiss me?"

"Because I liked you!" Ranma was shocked at her own words. She'd spent years denying them, but the passion of the moment brought them to the surface. "You were like me, a true martial artist, but you were a guy -a really tough guy. I wanted you to say I was cute and like me; do you really hate me so much for wanting that?"

"I suppose I can't blame you for what you wanted, but I'll never forgive you for what you did."

"So I should have been miserable and alone my whole life?"

"Well... you could have kissed someone else who was gay."

Ranma blinked in amazement. "Look at me, Ryoga. Do I look like a guy now? Did I look like a guy then?"

"Underneath your clothes you've got a... a thingie."

"Is that what you liked about me back then?"

"No..."

"Then that wasn't a gay kiss! You didn't see me as a guy and I didn't see me as a guy. In our own heads it was a girl kissing a boy, and it's the stuff going on in your head that makes you gay or straight."

Ryoga looked like he was struggling with himself, and Ranma realized she had the knockout punch. "You love Akane, and gay guys don't fall in love with girls." That did it and Ryoga fell to his knees. Ranma walked over and handed him his umbrella. "You'll need this if you wanna stay out here and think things over a bit. I'm going to bed."

Ranma woke up sore all over the next morning and stumbled downstairs without changing out of her nightgown. It didn't help her mood one bit when she saw Genma and Soun were there.

"Ranma, my boy! Good to see you! Akane says an old friend of yours stopped by the dojo while we were gone," said Genma voice so cheery it made Ranma's head hurt.

"Yeah, we had a great time catching up on old times." She looked around the table and saw it had already been picked clean. "So why did you two take that training trip? Any plans to take another one soon?"

"I don't think so," said Soun. "A month ago I noticed an ad in the paper saying that some fool called Tatewaki Kuno was offering a reward for someone to help him find our old master." Akane and Ranma shared an intense look of panic as Soun continued, "We didn't part on good terms, so it seemed prudent to get out of town for a while. Fortunately it was just a false alarm."

Ranma mulled over the issue as she rubbed her aching arms. Maybe she should go looking for Happosai herself. Living with him couldn't be worse than living with Pop… could it?

* * *

Author's Note: Thanks to my beta readers SoulCry and fuyukazehime


	4. Chapter 4

Ranma Saotome: Transgender Warrior

Chapter 4

* * *

Ranma smiled as she enjoyed a walk through Nerima's commercial district on a gorgeous afternoon. She decided to treat herself to ice cream, and as she walked up to the vendor he said, "Could I help you, sir?"

Ranma's good mood disappeared. "It's 'miss,' and I'll have pistachio."

The vendor gave her a closer look, and wordlessly handed over a cone. She paid and gave her ice cream a halfhearted lick as she walked away fuming. It was Pop's fault; in the few weeks he'd been back she couldn't wear a girl's uniform or makeup, and in her Chinese clothes she was in-between boy and girl again. She jumped onto a fence and got off two kicks before she landed. After tossing her cone in the air, she launched into a flurry of punches, dropped for a sweep kick, carried the motion into a one-handed handstand, caught the cone with the other hand, and gave it a lick; it tasted better now.

On the other side of the fence, she could see three girls in leotards waving ribbons, twirling hula hoops, and juggling clubs. The scene looked even crazier since she was upside-down, so she kept watching as she ate her ice cream. Suddenly, a girl wearing a uniform Ranma didn't recognize leapt into the scene twirling a black ribbon and laughing maniacally. "No training shall prepare you to face me!" she shouted as she snapped her ribbons at the other girls. "I am Kodachi Kuno, The Black Rose, and a rising star in the world of Martial Arts Rythmic Gymnastics!" She concluded by tossing black rose petals in the air for dramatic effect.

_It figures that Tatewaki's sister is just as crazy as him_, thought Ranma as she vaulted into the fray and grabbed Kodachi's ribbon with her free hand.

"Who dares delay my inevitable victory!"

"Hold on a sec." Ranma scarffed down the rest of her ice cream cone. "Ow, brain freeze. Shouldn't have done that." Kodachi threw a club at Ranma in frustration, but she casually caught it with a smile. "My name's Ranma Saotome."

"The girl my brother has been pining for?" She let out a shrill laugh. "I thought he had better standards; you could pass for a boy."

Ranma struggled to think of a comeback and decided to go out on a limb. "Well at least I'm girl enough to have a guy fall in love with me. I bet you scare boys away by being so psycho."

Kodachi's expression told Ranma she'd guessed right. "I shall waste no more time on you, harridan! I must prepare for my coming triumph over Furinkan High School!" She leapt away scattering black rose petals and laughing as she went.

Ranma went with the girls who'd been attacked to the school nurse; they'd each been cut by Kodachi's ribbon. After getting bandaged, the team captain said, "It would have been a lot worse if you hadn't stopped her. You're a real hero."

"Oh, it was nothing."

"You are! I've heard Kodachi has put some girls in the hospital. I'd love to get a chance to beat her in the ring, but none of us will be healed in a week. Could you face her?"

"Not wearing one of those things," Ranma said pointing to the leotard she wore.

"Why not?"

"Uh... I'd rather not say."

"We can't forfeit... oh I know who to ask!" The gymnasts ran to get Akane, and they eventually talked her into filling in for them.

Later that evening, Ranma wandered over to the dojo to find Akane wearing a yellow leotard and practicing for the match. "How are you gonna learn to use all this junk in just a week?" asked Ranma as she gestured to the various Rhythmic Gymnastics "tools" scattered about the floor.

"It can't be too tough. I think you're just supposed to throw most of these things, but I can't figure out what to do with this stupid ribbon; what good is it in a fight?"

"It's your most valuable weapon because it has the greatest reach to attack, it can ensnare your foe, and it can grab ammunition to throw at them," answered a voice from the door.

Akane turned to greet the visitor, "Ryoga! How do you know about Rhythmic Gymnastics?"

"I've encountered many arts in my travels," said Ryoga as he picked up a ribbon and twirled it in a perfect spiral, "and I'd be happy to teach you what I've learned."

"Great! Thank you!" said Akane, and she grabbed his hand to shake it.

The simple gesture ruined Ryoga's concentration entirely, and he twirled the ribbon around his own neck while sputtering, "Let's... begin... your... training."

Ranma sat down and watched Ryoga disentangle himself to begin teaching. He trembled with joy as he took Akane's hand in his and showed her the right wrist motion to control the ribbon. Then they each began making their ribbons dance side by side as Akane worked to make hers move in time with Ryoga's. Ranma struggled to focus on the technique, but her eyes kept returning to look at the rapturous expression on Ryoga's face. He didn't look anything like Kuno did when he professed his love and gave her flowers; Ryoga's adoration was selfless. Ranma couldn't stand it any longer, and she left the dojo.

After hopping up to the roof of the Tendo Household, Ranma began a Yin Style Banguazhang form. She moved slowly with twisted fingers poised for penetrating palm strikes and let the dark feelings within her flow out. Why did Ryoga have to fall in love with Akane? She'd seen him first! When would she get someone who really loved her? Would she have to get surgery first? That was years away at least! It wasn't fair! Being a girl sucks! The form concentrated all her negative emotions and expelled them into a phantom opponent, but the effort was exhausting. Ranma pushed herself for hours, and finally collapsed to lie on her back once she finished. The stars were beautiful.

Her rest was interrupted as she heard something at Akane's window. Bending over the edge of the roof she saw the intruder: Kodachi. "You just don't know when to quit do you?" said Ranma.

The girl's eyes gleamed with pure hatred. "I'll tolerate your interference no longer, harridan!" She leapt up to the roof twirling her ribbon, but Ranma dodged it and delivered a kick that sent her flying. Akane and Ryoga were just leaving the dojo at that moment, and Ryoga looked up just in time to see Kodachi flying at him. He caught her reflexively with a confused expression on his face. "Who is this strong man who's saved me?" asked Kodachi.

"I... I'm Ryoga Hibiki." He seemed unsure what to do, so he just kept holding Kodachi as she snuggled into his arms.

Ranma jumped down and yelled, "Watch out! She's the one who attacked our school's team!"

"So you're Kodachi," said Akane. "What are you doing here?"

"Just come to meet my new opponent, but I seem to have found so much more. What is this man to you?"

"He's my trainer."

"Not anymore." Kodachi stuck some black roses in Ryoga's face and they released a white cloud. She slipped out of his arms as the paralysis took effect. "Now he's going to be my boyfriend."

"You can't just claim him like that!" insisted Ranma as she grabbed Ryoga.

Kodachi gave a haughty smile and said, "Fine then. We'll settle this with the upcoming match. If I win, Ryoga is mine! Speak up if you have a problem with that, darling." Ryoga desperately tried to say something, but he couldn't make a sound. Kodachi blew him a kiss and leapt away with her increasingly grating laugh and black petals.

Ranma avoided Ryoga and Akane as they trained over the next week, but she couldn't get them out of her mind. She didn't even plan on going to the match until Akane asked her to come and help make sure Kodachi didn't cheat. Ranma reluctantly agreed, and her spirits dipped even lower when she saw Genma and Soun were coming as well.

"This should be quite a match, eh Saotome?" asked Soun as they walked into the gymnasium.

"Indeed it will be," replied Genma. "Did you notice the girl Akane's up against is named Kuno? I wonder if she's any relation to the fool who placed that ad looking for our master."

Kuno was in the stands to watch the match and overheard their conversation as they walked by. He rose and angrily confronted the surprised men. "I am the one who searches for the devil Happosai! Any who call him their master or call me a fool shall taste the sting of my bokken!"

Ranma shook her head and left the trio as their argument escalated. She went into Akane's dressing room and found her doing some last minute stretches with Ryoga.

"Hi Ranma," said Akane as she leaned back. "Have you seen any sign of... Kodachi!"

With her signature laugh, Kodachi dropped from the ceiling and brought a huge wooden mallet down on Akane's ankle. She threw a black rose to the floor that produced a smokescreen, and said, "See you later, Ryoga darling," as she disappeared.

"Where is she!" said Ryoga furiously as he smashed the furniture in the room with his umbrella.

"We'll deal with her later. Stay with Akane while I get help," ordered Ranma. She found the school nurse and brought her to take a look at Akane's ankle. It wasn't broken, but the sprain was too bad for there to be any hope of competing today. All the nurse could do was bandage it up and find a crutch for Akane.

"Ranma, you've got to substitute for me in the match," said Akane as she shakily got up using the crutch.

"I can't wear a leotard out there, and I've never done Rhythmic Gymnastics before."

"They'll probably be okay with the clothes you have on now if we promise not to complain about Kodachi's attack."

"And I'll train you during the match," said Ryoga. "You've got to win, Ranma, or I'll have to date that horrible girl!"

"This is crazy," sighed Ranma, but she agreed. After a short conference with the referee, she was in the ring.

"Ladies and Gentlemen! Welcome to the main event!" proclaimed the announcer. "In today's Rhythmic Gymnastics Martial Arts match the defending champion is twelve-time undefeated Kodachi Kuno of Saint Hebereke's School for Girls!" Wild cheers came from the Hebereke section.

"Her challenger is a complete newcomer to the sport who doesn't even have a leotard! Give it up for Ranma Saotome representing Furinkan High School!" Polite applause and confused murmurs came from the Furinkan section that were drowned out by boos from Hebereke.

"I didn't realize this was a coed competition," mused Genma.

"Look out Saotome! He's spotted us!" exclaimed Soun, and the pair ran around the ring to escape Kuno.

"The rules of Martial Arts Rhythmic Gymnastics are simple: the first combatant to be knocked unconscious or knocked out of the ring loses. There is no time limit, there are no rounds, and there is no way to stop the match. Combatants may only attack one another with weapons, and any direct contact will result in disqualification."

"Remember that, Ranma," said Akane. "You've got to use the Rhythmic Gymnastics tools."

"I know, I know," said Ranma as she snapped herself in the face trying to use her ribbon.

"Combatants, go to your corners. You may begin in 3... 2... 1... fight!"

Kodachi immediately launched a barrage of clubs at Ranma which she dodged by running around the ring. "Ryoga! Show me how to do that thing with the ribbon again!"

"It's all in the wrist," yelled Ryoga as he jogged around with her. He took off his belt and demonstrated. "See?"

"Okay," said Ranma, but she paid for taking her focus off Kodachi by getting beaned with a club.

The Black Rose advanced while the announcer breathlessly narrated her attack. "Wow! The Champion is attacking with that ribbon as if it were a steel bar. Hey, it IS a steel bar!" Ranma dodged most of the swings but hurt her arm when she had to block one of them.

"Referee! That's not a Rhythmic Gymnastics tool!" complained Akane.

"Maybe, but I can't stop to check until the fight's over."

"You're useless!" fumed Akane, and then she noticed Kuno, Genma, and her father running around outside the ring. "What the heck is going on here?"

Meanwhile, Ranma managed to catch Kodachi's bar and throw it out of the ring. It accidently hit Soun, and he tumbled to the ground. Kuno caught up to him and shouted, "Tell me where Happosai is or taste the full force of my wrath!" Akane wacked him with her crutch, and he flew into the ring hitting Kodachi.

"Do you think you can beat me with help from outside the ring?" screeched Kodachi. "Guess again!" She whistled, and the entire Hebereke Rhythmic Gymnastics Team emerged from under the ring. "Attack!" shouted Kodachi, and the battle was on.

"Look at the Hebereke girls go at it!" enthused the announcer. Genma and Soun climbed up into the ring and did their best to keep the hordes of gymnasts from overwhelming them. The Hebereke girls went after Akane too, but Ryoga protected her. It was getting crowded inside the ring, and a spiked club Kodachi threw nearly hit a teammate. Ranma was getting the hang of using the ribbon, but the melee was too thick for her to find an opening.

"There can't be more than two people fighting in the ring, right?" yelled Akane to the referee.

"There might be more than two people fighting here," said the referee as she ducked a gymnast jump kicking Soun, "but I can't stop to check until the match is over."

"This is ridiculous!" shouted Akane as she hopped up on her crutch to kick a gymnast with her good leg.

Ranma agreed, but she knew the chaos wouldn't stop until she beat Kodachi. She grabbed a club and thought she had an opening to hit Kodachi when she noticed Kuno had recovered and was about to attack Pop from behind. "I know I'll regret doing this," she muttered, and tossed her club to knock Kuno out.

"Amidst the confusion, The Champion outmaneuvers her opponent for a sneak attack!" cried the announcer as the Hebereke section shushed her.

"What the?" said Ranma as she looked around, but it was too late. Kodachi crept up from behind, got her ribbon around Ranma's neck, and began strangling Ranma as she cackled with glee. Ranma gasped for air and looked around frantically for a weapon, but nothing was in reach. She grabbed the end of Kodachi's own ribbon and snapped it her opponent's face. That distracted Kodachi long enough for Ranma to slip free.

"You can't run forever!" yelled Kodachi as she threw a razor-edged hula-hoop. Ranma grabbed the spiked club Kodachi had used earlier and batted the hoop up to the ceiling where it hit one of the spotlights.

"Look out!" yelled Ranma as the wreckage fell towards Akane, and Ryoga rushed to save her. He hugged Akane close and opened his umbrella just as twisted mass of metal hit. They recovered unscathed and blushed as they disengaged from the tight embrace.

"What devotion," sighed Kodachi.

"I know, and the worst thing is that she doesn't even realize how much he cares," said Ranma.

"The touching moment makes the fierce rivals bond over what they share in common," narrated the announcer.

"What? We're nothing alike!" shouted Ranma, but the announcer's words haunted her as the battle continued. Why did she want Ryoga to like her? It wasn't because she was really attracted to him, so did she just want the status and security of having a boyfriend? Her heart sunk as she realized she might want Ryoga for the same reasons as Kodachi.

_The important difference is that I'm fighting to let Ryoga follow his heart, and Kodachi's fighting to put him in a cage_, thought Ranma, and that gave her the passion to focus on winning the match. Kodachi was much more experienced with this style than she was, so how could she come up with an attack to defeat her?

The tide was turning against the other Hebereke gymnasts, so Genma took the time to offer some advice. "Hit her with a club, son!"

"Son?" said Kuno as he staggered to his feet, "Is that boy with an umbrella your son?"

"No, my son's right over -ow!" Ranma had tossed a ball to hit Genma and ricochet into Kuno.

"Your allies can't help you, harridan!" said Kodachi as she leapt high into the air, and Ranma saw her opening. Arial combat was one area where she had the edge on Kodachi. She tossed up a ball, and leapt to hit it just as it made contact with Kodachi. The blow sent Kodachi flying, and she whistled for her gymnasts to move the ring. The few that remained standing tugged at it, but there weren't enough of them to save Kodachi before she hit the gym floor.

"We have a winner!" yelled the announcer, and the enraged Hebereke crowd rushed onto the floor to meet the Furinkan crowd in a brawl. The Saotomes, the Tendos, and Ryoga fought their way out of the gym and ran back to the dojo.

That evening, Ranma sat on the roof thinking about the day's events when Ryoga joined her. "I wanted to say... thank you for what did today, Ranma." He awkwardly offered his hand, and Ranma shook it.

"Thanks, you did a great job protecting Akane."

Ryoga shook his head. "You're the real hero, Ranma: the one everyone can always rely on to save the day. I'm just a sojourner who'll be here one day and gone the next, and that's why I'm not worthy of Akane."

"Being the hero isn't all it's cracked up to be. I'll still be in-between boy and girl as long as Pop's around, and what chance do I have to be happy like this?"

"Nobody who really knows you would hold that against you."

"Even you?"

Ryoga paused. "I spent a long time thinking about what you said the last time we fought here, and I determined that my feelings don't have anything with you being half boy and half girl. I hate you because you're arrogant, sneaky, selfish..."

"Okay, I get the idea," grumbled Ranma. "You wanna spar?"

"Sure." They both shifted to fighting stances, and fought on the roof as the sun set on another day in Nerima.

* * *

Author's note: Thanks to my beta reader SoulCry


	5. Chapter 5

Ranma Saotome: Transgender Warrior

Chapter 5

* * *

Ranma walked through the Nerima Mall with a little extra swing in her hips. She was wearing a red Chinese dress with gold embroidery that she'd just bought on sale for only 3,000 yen. Although she wouldn't be able to wear it often, owning it still felt like a victory over her father. She stepped into an electronics store and admired how she looked on the hundred televisions that displayed her via camcorder.

A quiet voice came from behind her. "So, Ranma did change into girl." Ranma turned to see a girl dressed in pink and purple traditional Chinese clothing carrying a pair of chui. She wiped a tear from her eye, assumed a fighting stance, and shouted. "Ranma, die!"

* * *

About eighteen months earlier, before Ranma had been to Jusyenko, he faced the same girl on a log suspended in the air. It took all his training to focus his mind on what he'd seen of her fighting style instead of the gorgeous body that performed those moves. She carried weapons like all the combatants, and they all seemed to use the largest they could manage. They were too proud of their strength to use tricks. Ranma stood his ground as the girl charged swinging her chui and faked a sweep kick with his right before coming up high with his left. The blow slipped through the girl's arms and caught her in the chin. She went flying and landed hard on the ground a few feet below.

Ranma jumped down and knelt by the girl to check if she was all right. Her eyes fluttered open and looked from Ranma to an old woman in the crowd leaning on a walking stick. The old woman nodded, and the girl surprised Ranma with a kiss on the lips.

"What's going on?" asked Ranma as the girl embraced him.

"You've been engaged to my great granddaughter." explained the old woman in perfect Japanese. "Meet your new wife, Xian Pu."

"Shampoo?" said Ranma as he struggled with the Mandarin. The girl giggled.

A lot of people in the crowd didn't seem pleased by what was going on, but they quieted down once the old woman spoke a few harsh words to them. She turned back to Ranma and said, "I am Khu Lon, the eldest in our tribe. We welcome you to live as one of us here in Joketsuzoku."

"Listen, 'Cologne,' or whatever your name is," said Genma. "Ranma only fought to win the food we ate. He's already got a fiancée."

"You are on our land, and our law is that an unwed woman defeated by a man outside the tribe must marry him. Most of our girls would be horrified to wed a man stronger than them, but my great granddaughter is unique in many ways. Perhaps fate intervened to provide a husband right for her."

"I've had about enough of your land and your laws. Come on, Ranma, let's leave these people to their primitive ways."

"On our land, men also respect women," said Cologne as she knocked Genma out with a lightning-quick whack from her staff.

"Pop!" shouted Ranma, and he disengaged from Shampoo to assume a fighting stance.

"Come now, future son-in-law. Do you really think you could defeat all of us and escape carrying that fat old man?" Ranma ignored her, charged with a shout, and met the same fate as his father. "Strong, brave, and not too bright," commented Cologne as Ranma was felled by her blow. "He's perfect for my great granddaughter."

Ranma awoke after dark in a tent lit by candles. He blinked his eyes open and saw Sampoo was kneeling beside him, naked. "Wo ai ni," she whispered and put her hand on his chest. Ranma realized he was naked too beneath the fur blanket, and he gathered it up to cover himself as he stood. He rushed to open the tent flap to be met by a trio of Amazon women pointing their blades at his throat.

Ranma gulped, closed the tent, and went back to lie down. Shampoo curled up next to him with an expression of pure happiness on her face. "Wo ai ni."

* * *

Shampoo smashed her chui into a big screen television missing Ranma by inches, and the Amazon destroyed more tech toys with each swing as Ranma retreated. Ranma sidestepped an attack, got behind Shampoo, and twisted her arm to make her drop one of the chui. Shampoo swung over her head at Ranma with the other chui, but Ranma caught Shampoo's arm and flipped her into a home theater system while keeping a hold on the weapon.

Ranma cautiously approached the disarmed warrior. "Shampoo, I... I wish things could have been different. I'll make things right some day."

"Things can never be right!" yelled Shampoo as she smashed a speaker into Ranma. "Ranma make everything wrong!" She started throwing computer monitors at Ranma, but she was ready this time and dodged them. Undeterred, Shampoo grabbed a display case filled with cameras, tossed it up to smash on the ceiling, and batted the falling cameras at Ranma with her hands and feet; Ranma dodged most as they came flying at her, but one hit right between the eyes.

Shampoo took advantage of Ranma's temporary disorientation to tackle her to the ground. She pinned her fiancée and started banging Ranma's head into the floor. Ranma got an arm free and used it to knock a leg off a shelf supporting half a dozen televisions; they tumbled onto Shampoo, and Ranma dug herself out of the rubble. She'd barely had time to catch her breath when Shampoo emerged looking as angry as ever.

Ranma ran out of the store with Shampoo in hot pursuit. She leapt from one escalator to the next as other shoppers looked on in astonishment. In a few seconds, she'd reached the top floor and used a kiosk as a stepping stool to leap through the ceiling of skylights. Ranma had hoped to escape to another building, but Shampoo was right on her heels. They circled each other on the unsteady glass, and the sunshine made it look like they were walking on light.

* * *

Ranma and Shampoo balanced on stepping stones in a perfectly still pond as they did a kata together. It was a Joketsuzoku form Ranma had never seen before, but he mirrored Shampoo's slow, graceful motions. He stopped feeling like he was in his own body when he practiced with her. A disembodied presence that existed to observe Shampoo's perfect body was all that was remained.

Shampoo stopped. "Where Ranma's spirit?"

"What do you mean?" They'd each learned a bit of each other's language in the past month, but communication was still difficult.

"Shampoo see Ranma fight with spirit, but Ranma no practice with spirit. Need spirit be true warrior."

"It's just... I feel one with you when we train together."

"Shampoo no feel Ranma. Shampoo feel like she practice alone."

"I'm sorry, but could we go on anyway?"

"Ranma's spirit go away when Ranma look at Shampoo. Ranma's spirit go away when Ranma touch Shampoo. Why?"

"I don't know what you mean..."

"Shampoo love Ranma's spirit! Why Ranma take spirit away from Shampoo?"

Ranma did know why as he looked at their images reflected in the water. He had hoped for years that he could be a real man once he found the right girl, but he'd found the perfect woman and it didn't help. He didn't want to be her husband; he wanted to be HER. The more he was around her the more he retreated from the world to imagine himself in her body. If it kept up, the face he showed to the outside world would be nothing but a shell.

Shampoo managed to calm down. "Ranma's spirit no can go away when Ranma marry Shampoo." Ranma had figured out by now this meant consummating their union. Until then, they were just engaged. "Marriage very important thing and marriage with no spirit very bad."

Ranma agreed with that.

* * *

Ranma stepped carefully on the glass. If they fought here it was only a matter of time before one or both of them fell through. "Let's find another place for this, Shampoo."

"No. This perfect place. Ranma will die, or Shampoo will die. Then one can be happy."

"I was dead every day that I tried to be your husband, and you would eventually have been just as dead on the inside if I had stayed. But we aren't in Joketsuzoko any more, so we don't have to follow the laws that were killing us both."

Shampoo shook her head. "Ranma escape Amazon law when Ranma escape Joketsuzoko, but Shampoo never can escape. Amazon law inside Shampoo."

Ranma nodded sadly. "I've got laws inside me I can't escape either." She surprised Shampoo by charging forward with a high kick just like the one she used to win their match in Joketsuzoko. Ranma sent Shampoo flying, smashed the glass where she would have landed, embraced Shampoo as she fell, and grabbed a banner as they reentered the mall. They swung into the cinema on the top floor, and Ranma released Shampoo to send her hurtling into the popcorn maker.

Shampoo recovered, picked up a nearby slushie machine and threw it. Ranma dodged and said, "We've been through all of this already, Shampoo."

"Shampoo will never stop!" yelled the Amazon, but she was running out of energy. She charged and launched another flurry of punches and kicks that didn't come close to connecting. Ranma sprinted out of the cinema, and Shampoo was too winded to keep up.

Ranma ran to a sporting goods store, grabbed a Rhythmic Gymnastics ribbon, tossed the last of her money at a bewildered clerk, and ran out yelling, "Sorry but this is an emergency!" She returned to find Shampoo shoving her way through the crowd of frightened shoppers. Ranma ensnared her winded opponent, twirled the ribbon around Shampoo, and tied a knot. "Ryoga was right; these things are pretty handy."

"Ranma let Shampoo go and finish fight!" yelled her fiancé, but Ranma hoisted Shampoo on her shoulder and carried the struggling Amazon out of the mall.

Ranma leapfrogged Nerima's rooftops to take Shampoo to the Tendo household. She checked to see if the coast was clear, and brought Shampoo into her empty room. "The fight's over, Shampoo. Let's talk."

* * *

"Shampoo, there's something I need to tell you." Night had fallen, and they were alone in their tent. Pop had a crazy plan to sneak out wearing panda costumes, and Ranma thought Shampoo deserved to hear the real reason he was leaving. She looked at him expectedly, and the words wouldn't come. He was insane to do this! She made him breakfast every morning, she showed him secret martial arts techniques every day, and she snuggled with him every night. She was the most beautiful and affectionate person he'd ever known, and he was giving her up to try something that made Pop's panda plan sound smart.

Ranma took a deep breath and felt the air move in and out of his body. "I'm going to change from being a boy to being a girl." It was the first time Ranma had really spoken those words, and she felt a surge of strength that had been fading in the time she'd spent thinking of herself as "he." She took another deep breath, and it tasted so much sweeter than the one a second earlier. She knew she'd made the right choice.

Shampoo looked horrified. "That bad thing to do! Legend tell of evil sorcerer jealous of women's power who become woman, and gods kill sorcerer!"

"This isn't a legend, Shampoo. This is my life."

"Ranma and Shampoo have one life together."

"You know that isn't true. Think about how you said my spirit goes away when I touch you. We don't have one life, and we never will."

Shampoo blinked away tears. "Ranma can do anything but become girl, and Shampoo will love Ranma. Why Ranma want to do this?"

"I think it's so I can live my own life instead of living through you. That would be awful for both of us."

"Ranma make decision without Shampoo. How will Shampoo live life?"

"I know it will hard for you; it's because of your great-grandmother's stupid rules. You should be able to marry whoever you want and be happy. I'm sorry I can't make things easier for you Shampoo; I'm really sorry." Ranma put her hand on Shampoo's shoulder, but she batted it away. She beat her fists on her fiancée's chest, and Ranma took every blow.

"If Ranma become girl, Shampoo must kill Ranma! Law says Amazon must kill any outsider woman who defeat Amazon."

"Well... maybe I can convince Cologne to make an exception because I was a man when I beat you -sort of."

Shampoo gave a bitter laugh. "Great-grandmother no change law for son-in-law who try to be girl!"

"Some day I'll be able to make her change it. I'll train till I can beat her, and then I'll come back to fix things here for you."

"Ranma no beat great-grandmother. It more crazy than Ranma become girl."

"Maybe it is but I've got to try."

Shampoo picked up a candle to throw it, but she stopped as she locked eyes with Ranma; Ranama's spirit shined brighter than Shampoo had ever seen. She snuffed out the flame and said, "Ranma go do what Ranma must do and Shampoo will do what Shampoo must do."

Ranma nodded, crawled under the tent, and escaped Joketsuzoku with her father.

* * *

Ranma put Shampoo on her bedroll and closed the door in hopes they wouldn't be overheard. "When I left, I knew we'd eventually end up like this. I just hoped I could have a few more years before it happened. By the way, how did you find me?"

"Shampoo call house, and nice girl say you at mall."

"I guess I better tell Kasumi to ask if someone's trying to kill me before telling them where I am. Hey, wait a minute, how did you even get to Japan and know I was staying here?"

Shampoo gave a satisfied smile. "Amazons have secret friends help Shampoo come to Japan and find Ranma. Friends help Shampoo find Ranma anywhere."

"Great, well then I guess we've got to figure out how to settle things between us."

"Nothing settled until Ranma or Shampoo die."

"Yeah, you said that already." Ranma sat down and tried to think. "Hey wait a sec, if I'm a guy then you have to marry me, and if I'm a girl you have to kill me right?"

"Yes."

"Well right now I'm half and half." Shampoo looked confused, so Ranma started to take off her clothes. "I guess it's nothing you haven't seen before –most of it anyway." She took her new dress off and sighed at the rips and stains from the fight. Then she took off her underwear, and Shampoo gasped.

"Ranma still has boy part!"

Ranma blushed and put on some fresh clothes. "I went to a place called Jusenkyo after I left your village, and I heard about magic that could change a boy into a girl. It turned out to be just a myth, but you can do the same stuff with normal medicine. The pills I take every day change a lot, but I need surgery to uh… switch the boy part to a girl part. Until then, I'm half boy and half girl." She pulled out her hormone pills from their hiding place in her bedroll and displayed them to Shampoo.

"Pills make Ranma half girl, but Ranma still half boy," said Sampoo in amazement.

"Yeah, so neither law applies to me. You don't have to kill me or marry me," said Ranma hopefully.

After pausing for a moment, the captive girl replied, "Shampoo need ask great-grandmother what Shampoo must do. It very strange thing."

_Well at least that buys me a month or so to figure out what to do next_, thought Ranma as she untied Shampoo. Then she was surprised as Shampoo embraced her.

"Shampoo still love boy Ranma."

"I looked like a boy back in China but I did a pretty bad job of acting like one. Did you just fall in love with how I looked?"

"No, Shampoo fall in love with Ranma's spirit." She paused to look into Ranma's eyes. "Spirit still there."

"It always will be inside me no matter how my body changes. Does that mean you'll love me when I don't have the boy half anymore?"

"Shampoo not know. Shampoo confused." She broke the embrace. "Goodbye, Ranma." Then she left her fiancée without another word.

* * *

Author's note: Thanks to my beta reader SoulCry


	6. Chapter 6

Ranma Satome: Transgender Warrior

Chapter 6

* * *

Ranma and Akane argued with one another as they walked home after another eventful day at Furinkan High School. "I don't know how many more battles the school will be able to take. You've got to stop fighting so much," said Akane.

"Kuno started things by attacking Ryoga, and I just got caught in the middle."

"Well, did you stop to think why they were fighting?"

"It was because of that big stupid statue Ryoga brought for…" Ramna caught herself before telling Akane the statue had been for her; Kuno got wind of the gift, and that's why he'd attacked. "…for a souvenir or something, I guess."

"That's your problem: you just jump in without knowing what's going on and expect a fight to solve everything. If you tried talking for a change, we might have some peace around here"

"Believe me, Akane," said Ranma as she opened the door to the Tendo household, "I'd do anything to get a little peace..." She trailed off as she saw Kasumi having tea with two guests in the living room.

"Greetings, future son-in-law," said Cologne as she put down her cup.

"Nihao, Ranma!" said Shampoo as she ran to glomp onto her flabbergasted fiancé.

"But... but..." sputtered Ranma, "it's only been a week! How did you get to Joketsuzoku and back so fast?"

"Shampoo stay in Japan and send letter to great-grandmother. She say Ranma is boy since Ranma has boy part!"

"I caught a flight here to make sure you drop all this nonsense about being a girl and marry my great-granddaughter," said Cologne.

"Ranma, what's going on here?" asked Soun as he came into the room with Genma. "The only person you're marrying is Akane."

Akane had been amused by Ranma's predicament, but the reminder that they were still engaged made her shift into attack mode. "There's no way I'm marrying a jerk who goes around China picking up girls!"

"Come on, Akane, you know I'm not like that," pleaded Ranma as her last ally in the room deserted her. "I got engaged to Shampoo by accident."

"Indeed you did," added Genma. "We're in Japan now, so these crazy women have no power..." Genma gulped as Cologne shot him and icy stare, and he shut up.

The phone rang at that moment, and Kasumi got up to answer it. Everyone else focused on Cologne as she spoke: "In our village, Ranma will have no choice but to become a man. Here in Japan, you clearly haven't been able to set him on the right path." She opened her hand to reveal Ranma's bottle of hormone pills.

"Hey! Where did you get those?" Ranma remembered she'd showed them to Shampoo, and the Amazon girl looked contrite.

"Shampoo sorry, Ranma."

"Yeah, sure. Give those back!" yelled Ranma as she pushed away from Shampoo and lunged at Cologne, but the Matriarch deftly withdrew the pills from her.

"Ranma, you've shamed our family again by betraying your manhood," said Genma gravely.

"Uh... I was holding those for a friend of mine," said Ranma lamely as she frantically tried to get the pills from Cologne.

Kasumi returned to the room holding the phone receiver. "There's a boy named Mousse asking for you, Ranma, and he won't say if he wants to kill you."

Ranma sighed. "Put him on speakerphone so we can all hear what he wants." Kasumi did so, and Ranma said, "Hi, Mousse, what's up?"

"Ranma you need to meet me right away! Cologne is coming to Japan to make you marry Shampoo!"

"Err... she's in the room listening right now."

"Shampoo love Ranma!" said the Amazon as she stood up ready to smash the phone.

"Calm down, great-granddaughter," said Cologne, "You rejected Mousse years ago, and by Amazon law he is rejected forever."

"Will someone please tell me what's going on here?" said Soun as tears flowed from his eyes.

"I refuse to give up! Ranma, we need craft a secret plan to beat Cologne!"

"That'll be pretty tough when she can hear you as well as I can."

"Oh right... come alone to the Nerima fairgrounds tomorrow afternoon, and I'll find you. Don't look for me because I'll be in disguise!"

"Foolish boy, he can't help you," said Cologne as the line went dead. She hopped aside as Ranma made another fruitless dive at her hormone pills. "Come with me if you want to earn these back." They left Genma to fill the Tendos in on what was going on.

Outside, the Amazon matriarch casually knocked down a dead tree branch with her staff, chopped it into kindling with her bare hands, and started a fire by rubbing two sticks together at blinding speed. "Once you marry Shampoo, I will personally teach you the secret training techniques of our tribe. This is but a small sampling of our heritage." She tossed some nuts into the fire and said, "Behold, Kachu Tenshin Amaguriken: The Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire Fist!" Her hands blurred as she darted them into the flames and returned clutching the chestnuts. "Practice this and you might be fast enough to get these pills." The old woman cackled and tossed a bag of uncooked chestnuts at Ranma's feet. "Let's go, Shampoo."

The old woman left, but Shampoo lagged behind. "Shampoo very sorry, Ranma. Shampoo not know great-grandmother take Ranma's pills."

"Well maybe you should have thought about that before you told her," grumbled Ranma. "I can't afford to get more because our fight at the mall cost me all the money I had, and Pop won't give me an allowance now that he knows what I'll spend it on."

"Ranma no need pills. Ranma be man and marry Shampoo."

"Are you as deaf as Mousse?" yelled Ranma. That seemed to really upset Shampoo, but Ranma didn't stop: "I don't want to be a man, and I don't want to marry you!"

Shampoo left, and Ranma turned her attention to the fire. She'd do this stupid training and get her pills back from that old ghoul! Reducing her problems to a martial arts challenge made Ranma feel comfortable, and she started to practice grabbing chestnuts. She was quick enough to grab one or two, but she wasn't fast enough to get a whole handful like Cologne had before her hands hurt too much. Once her hands were burnt too badly to go on, she stuck them in the koi pond to cool off and decided this was enough practice for today. She had to admit it was a good training technique, and she was pretty sure she'd eventually master it. The problem was that she knew it would be harder to concentrate every day she went without taking hormones.

She went back inside where the excitement caused by the Amazons had finally died down. Soun and Genma were sitting at the table and gave Ranma a stern look as she entered. "Ranma my boy," began Genma, "I had hoped the chance to marry one of Soun's fine daughters would cure you of your inexplicable desire to become a girl. It seems that more extreme methods are needed."

"Indeed," said Soun as he nodded. "I hoped that sending you to school with Akane would make the two of you bond, but you'll never grow to love each other until you become more of a man."

"So now we're sending you to St. Brutus' School for Boys," continued Genma. "There you will endure torture beyond your wildest dreams from your fellow classmates if your mind, body, and soul are not 100 percent masculine."

Ranma's jaw dropped. An all boy's middle school had been hard enough to survive, but high school after she'd already been on hormones... what if they didn't have private showers for gym? "No Pop, please, anything but that! I'll be a man! Oh you just watch what a manly man I can be!" She dropped her voice and walked with exaggerated machismo. "Ha ha ha! I think I'll go drink a six pack of beer, start a fight for the fun of it, and kiss every pretty babe I see 'cuz I'm a man, and that's what a man does!"

"You aren't fooling anyone, Ranma" deadpanned Soun. "You start at St. Brutus after winter break."

Ranma dropped the act, trudged upstairs, and collapsed on her bedroll. Life was so unfair! She did her best to be an honorable martial artist and got nothing but grief. Why had she been so stupid to tell everything to Shampoo? Now she was going to be in even worse shape at an all boy's school with a body that's half girl. Maybe she should just forget about taking hormones and let her body get more masculine; it probably wouldn't take too long since she was still going through puberty. What little she had for curves would melt away, and she'd start growing hair all over her body... Just thinking about it was too much; Ranma choked up and tried to hold back the tears, but she couldn't stop them from coming.

It was the first time Ranma had let a few tears slip out since she was a little kid, and the pain she'd buried in all those years started to bubble up to the surface. It had hurt every time she saw a girl her age looking pretty and having fun. It had hurt every time her father called her "boy" and talked about how she had to be a "man among men." It had hurt to get rejected by Ryoga and see him fall in love with someone else. It had hurt to be pulled away from Ucchan so much that she couldn't even let herself think about her oldest friend anymore. As all this started breaking through the floodgates, Ranma panicked; if she let it all out now, it might overwhelm her. That would be suicide with all the trouble ahead, so she pushed it all back down yet again.

There was a soft knock on the door, and Ranma quickly composed herself. "It's me," said Akane. "Can I come in?"

"Sure, no problem," Ranma said as confidently as she could. "What's up?"

"Ranma, what's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong... well, Pop's sending me to an all boy's school, but I can deal with that."

"You don't have to act so macho about it."

"What do you mean? I'm just confident, that's all. Girls can be confident too."

"You're hiding your emotions because you think they'll make you look weak. I know that's something guys do because dad did it when my mom died. He didn't cry at all back then, and losing mom just made him act even more stoic. He might have thought it helped us for him to be strong, but he showed so little emotion I thought he was angry about something. It seems silly now, but I thought he was angry at me. Kasumi figured out what was wrong after a year and had daddy explain things to me. He was never a better father to me than when he let me see him cry that day, and he's never held back since –although he does go a little overboard sometimes."

Akane smiled as she cried a little herself from the memory. "Bad stuff happens to everyone, Ranma, so stop acting like a stupid boy and tell me why you were crying."

"Just... everything. I can't put it all into words. It's been really hard wanting to be a girl my whole life, and now that I'm close to getting there I might end up going backwards. I feel stupid for even hoping I could do it; now everything's going to get wrecked, and I'll be even more miserable because I got a taste of what I'm missing."

"That sounds awful."

"Yeah... so now what? Thanks for trying to help, but I don't still feel bad."

"Well then let more of it out."

"You couldn't understand what it's like, so what's the point?"

"You haven't had your mother die, so how could you understand what that's like? All the same, I felt a little better telling you about it."

"Somebody having their mom die is a normal kind of thing to feel sad about; when people hear about it they all tell you they're sorry. The stuff I've been through isn't normal; if people heard about it they'd think I'm a freak."

"I promise I won't."

"You can't promise that; nobody knows how they'll feel about something before they hear it. Besides, you've already called me a pervert before."

"I'm sorry about that, Ranma. I really am."

"Well... thanks, but maybe we could talk some other time."

Ranma reached out to shake hands, and Akane noticed the burns for the first time. "Ranma, what happened?"

"Oh, I just burned them a little with a special training technique."

"Let me get some ointment."

"Come on, you don't have to make a big deal out of it," said Ranma, but she gave in without too much protest. Akane helped make Ranma's hands feel better, and by the time she was done Ranma realized she wasn't feeling too bad on the inside either. She went to bed and managed to get a good night's rest.

Sparring with Pop the next morning, Ranma let her father score a few hits as she chatted with him, "Wow, Pop! You're really fighting great today! Say, how about if I manage to beat you I don't have to go to St. Brutus? If you win... I'll do your laundry for a month!"

"No deal, Ranma. I need my son back, and I learned the hard way you should never gamble more than you can stand to lose."

"Hey Pop, I'm right here! Your son isn't going anywhere."

Genma gave her a hard look. "I wish I could believe that, but I can't."

That took the wind out of Ranma's sails; she went through the rest of the morning feeling guilty and angry at the same time. Going to Furinkan, the school never looked better. She was morose thinking of all the little things she'd miss about the place. After school let out, she wandered over to the Nerima fairgrounds. She didn't really have much hope Mousse could help solve anything, but at least meeting him might make her forget about her troubles. On the way there, she thought back to when she'd met him last year.

* * *

Ranma and Shampoo skipped along the treetops of the vast bamboo forest surrounding Joketsuzoku. The Amazons let Ranma roam outside the village since because they knew he'd never leave without his father, and they kept Genma on a much tighter leash. Still, the breathtaking mountain vista made it impossible for Ranma to think of himself as a captive. Shampoo lead him to the cliff that overlooked the entire valley, and Ranma could just barely make out the village miles below.

After barely a moment to take in the view, Ranma was surprised as an Amazon boy in a white robe leaped up and hugged him close. "Shampoo! My love!"

"Ummm... Shampoo's over there," Ranma said awkwardly.

The boy put on a thick pair of glasses, reappraised Ranma, and knocked him away with blow that caught Ranma completely off guard. "You're the man who wants to take Shampoo away from me!"

"Mousse just childhood friend want marry Shampoo," explained the Amazon girl.

"I've loved you my entire life!" declared Mousse.

"Stupid Mousse always embarrass Shampoo, so Ranma better husband. Shampoo love Ranma."

"What are you doing here?" Ranma asked Mousse angrily.

"I've followed you to this peak far from where Cologne can protect you. Here I'll win Shampoo's hand in marriage by proving I'm stronger than this outsider!" shouted Mousse, and a storm of edged weapons flew from his sleeves toward Ranma.

Ranma was ready this time, and Mousse's weapons only cut bamboo trees. A seemingly endless barrage of projectiles flew at Ranma, and he knew he couldn't keep dodging forever; it seemed like Mousse was already reading Ranma's moves to come even closer to scoring a deadly hit with each throw. To make matters worse, the Amazon boy was clearly more experienced fighting in this terrain, and the tall trees made it easy to stay out of close combat.

Ranma tried to go on the offensive by grabbing a small bamboo tree sliced to a sharp point and hurling it at Mousse. His opponent just sliced the tree lengthwise with a knife and said, "You'll have to do better than that to defeat my Hidden Weapon Technique!" He produced an iron ball on a chain and spun it around to shatter dozens of trees. Ranma couldn't escape all the shards of wood sent flying by the attack, and his body was covered in scrapes.

"Shampoo no love Mousse even if Mousse win!" said the girl as she moved away from the carnage to protect herself.

Mousse's cool demeanor vanished. "But... you always hated me because I was a loser. How could you love him even if he lost?"

Ranma took advantage of the distraction to grab two staff-length tree trunks. He charged at Mousse spinning his makeshift weapons to deflect projectiles as Mousse renewed his attacks. Once Ranma reached Mousse, the Amazon withdrew his hands into his sleeves, and he shouted, "Fist of the White Swan!" as he produced a new weapon. Ranma gambled at meeting this attack head on, and he punched through the swan-shaped child's training potty Mousse was holding to smash his fist right into Mousse's glasses.

"That's your Fist of the White Swan?" said Ranma as he looked at the shattered ceramic. "I think I did you a favor by getting rid of it."

"Mock me at your own peril, Ranma!" yelled Mousse as he savagely attacked a shrub.

"I'm over here, Mousse."

The boy adjusted his glasses, but one lens was completely gone and the other was cracked. "Our duel has only just begun!" He whipped out some bombs and started throwing them wildly. The blasts shook the unstable terrain, and the top of the cliff they stood on broke off to plunge into the valley thousands of feet bellow. Ranma grabbed one of Mousse's roped hooks and the boy himself. He leapt and threw the hook to catch one of the few bamboo trees left standing, and they swung to the cliff face.

"You saved me," said a shell-shocked Mousse.

"Don't make me regret it," grunted Ranma. The tree they were relying on gave way, and they tumbled down the slope to a narrow ledge. "Okay, maybe we better catch our breath for a second here."

Mousse was still working through what had happened. "I owe you my life, so how can I kill you and marry Shampoo?"

"She doesn't seem to like you; why are you so hung up on her?"

"We are two twin souls destined to be together. I was always an outcast because I wasn't like all the other boys in our village; I wanted to be a warrior, but they just wanted a strong wife to take care of them. Shampoo was more popular because she was Cologne's only heir, but she loved to be pretty; that made her just as different from the rest as I."

"Wait a minute, you're both just a normal guy and a normal girl; it's the rest of those burly women and wimpy guys back in the village that are weird."

Mousse gave Ranma an odd look through his broken glasses. "I guess it's a matter of perspective. If all the women in Japan are pretty, then why don't you go marry one of them and leave me Shampoo?"

"Well, I can't leave because Cologne won't let me, but if I could..." Ranma trailed of and imagined himself marrying a Japanese girl, having kids, and eventually becoming an old man; it horrified him. Ranma shock off the feeling and saw Mousse was just as troubled. "Look, I don't think things are going to work out with me and Shampoo, so if we break up I hope you two can get together."

"You really mean that? Wow! Then I wouldn't have to feel guilty for killing a man who saved my life!"

"Umm... great," said Ranma. "You got any climbing gear in there?" Mousse rummaged around in his robe and eventually pulled out ropes, spring-loaded cams, nuts, and a few quickdraws. The pair didn't have any trouble getting back to the summit where Shampoo was waiting.

* * *

Ranma meandered through the crowd at the Nerima fairgrounds. Most of the people here were families with kids, and she felt out of place. Off in the distance, she heard someone say, "Hi Ranma!" over and over again at irregular intervals. She followed the noise and encountered a sight so ridiculous she couldn't help smiling. The source of the commotion was someone wearing a duck costume with spectacles perched on the bill that kept tumbling off. The duck kept going up to a random passer by, saying "Hi Ranma!" and getting a confused response as the fairgoer hurried away.

Ranma did her best not to giggle. "Hey Mousse, I'm over here."

The duck adjusted his glasses and approached cautiously. "How did you know it was me?"

That was too much, and Ranma burst out laughing as the duck watched in puzzlement. Once she got back under control, she replied, "It was just a lucky guess. So, what's your master plan to beat Cologne?"

"Well, if we work together I'm sure we'll figure something out."

"I dunno," said Ranma as they strolled through the fair. "Right now I'm focused on getting my pills back from her."

"Pills?"

"They're sex hormone pills; I've been taking them to turn into a girl, and Cologne stole them. She says I've got to practice the Kachu Tenshin Amaguriken to be fast enough to get it back."

The duck stopped walking. "Did you just say you were turning into a girl?"

"Yeah."

"Oh, wow." The duck looked around and whispered, "You shouldn't talk about stuff like that in broad daylight. People will think we're a pair of weirdoes."

Ranma suppressed another giggle. "Sorry about that."

"Well, I don't hold it against you, but a lot of other people might. Hey wait a minute, this means you can't marry Shampoo!"

"I'm only halfway to being a girl right now, and if I don't get those pills back I'll start turning back into a guy."

"Okay, but even if we get them back it wouldn't be a permanent solution since Cologne could steal them again, or drag you back to China, or something. Hey wait a sec, does she do that thing where she taunts you by holding them her palm like masters do in martial arts movies?"

"Yeah."

"Then we can get your pills back and beat her at the same time!" Ranma listened to Mousse's plan, and she had to admit the guy could be pretty smart when he wasn't being outrageously stupid.

That evening, the Amazon boy lead Ranma and Akane to the Nekoken cafe Cologne had just opened. "What's she doing here?" asked Mousse referring to Akane.

"I'm here because Ranma's wearing my kimono, and I want to make sure it doesn't get ruined."

"It may be YOUR kimono, but this is MY plan and..."

"Cool it, Mousse, everything will be fine," said Ranma with more confidence than she felt. It was hard enough to psyche herself up for this fight without her allies turning against each other. She'd practiced the Kachu Tenshin Amaguriken again, but she still was a little too slow to get a full handful of chestnuts. She didn't want to go another day without hormones, so she had to be fast enough to get her pills back tonight!

The trio stepped into the Nekoken Cafe ready for battle. There were only a few customers still here this late, and the martial artists slowly advanced towards the kitchen where there were sounds of activity. Ranma got a nod from each of her comrades, assumed a combat stance, and slowly moved to push aside the curtain. Suddenly, Shampoo emerged and glomped onto Ranma. "Ranma come visit Shampoo at new waitress job! Take seat here." Ranma was too surprised to react as Shampoo lead her to a table.

"Specialty of Nekoken Cafe is ramen. Great-Grandmother cook all type of ramen: chicken ramen, pork ramen, beef ramen, tofu ramen, vegetable ramen..."

"Shampoo, we didn't come here to eat," began Ranma.

"Shampoo know. Ranma just come to say 'hi' and wish Shampoo good luck at new job. Shampoo very happy and give Ranma sample of ramen for free!"

"We're here to fight Cologne," announced Mousse. Shampoo looked offended, and Mousse rushed to add, "Of course, we also really hope you do great as a waitress and everything..."

"Silence fool," ordered Cologne; she'd come out of the kitchen while the rest of them were talking with Shampoo. "Ranma, you've come for this, haven't you?" She opened her palm to reveal the pill bottle. "Take it back if you can!"

Ranma leapt from her seat, and her hands blurred as she grabbed for the pills again and again. "Pretty fast boy, but I can tell you still haven't mastered the Kachu Tenshin Amaguriken!"

"I'm not a boy!" shouted Ranma, but Cologne just cackled and hopped onto a table. Ranma followed, and they leapfrogged around the restaurant as the patrons looked on in disbelief. They knocked over a few bowls of ramen, but Akane ran behind catching the bowls and making sure none of the food got on her kimono.

Meanwhile, Mousse's attempts to calm down Shampoo only made her angrier. "Mousse go back to China! Shampoo no marry Mousse!" She bashed Mousse with a serving tray and continued to attack as he ran around the restaurant to escape.

Ranma ignored all of this and focused on her technique. She knew she could do this; just a little faster and she'd have the pills. Cologne didn't seem worried. "You're a boy, Ranma, because you can still be a father. That's all that men are good for, and if you're foolish enough to cast aside that asset you still won't be a woman; you'll be nothing."

"Shut up, old ghoul, you don't get to make the rules."

"They're the laws of nature."

"No they aren't!" _Faster._ "It's just stuff people like you say because you're afraid of people like me!" _Faster._ "You've got a system that says women deserve to be in charge, and that doesn't make any sense if guy can become girls." _Faster._ "That's a stupid way of doing stuff, and it'll die off once old fossils like you aren't here to shove it down our throats!" _Faster!_ "Kachu Tenshin Amaguriken!"

The whole room was silent and still. Ranma breathed heavily as she glared at Cologne. The old woman blinked, looked down at her hand, and smiled. "Not fast enough, future-son-in-law."

"Guess again, old ghoul." Ranma produced the bottle of pills from the kimono sleeve for Cologne to see, and the Amazon Matriarch saw she was holding a small gas canister the same size and color as the bottle. It went off just before she could react, and she was enveloped in smoke. Once it cleared, the whole room saw her knocked out with her face in a bowel of ramen.

"My bomb worked perfectly! The Hidden Weapons Technique triumphs!" said Mousse, and he ran over to bind up Cologne with a vast array of restraints.

"Ranma beat great-grandmother..." said Shampoo in shock. "Now, great-grandmother must marry Ranma!"

"Only if she still thinks I'm a guy," said Ranma cheerily as Cologne came around. "What's it going to be?"

Cologne groaned. "Very well, I declare that you never have been a man. In the eyes of our tribe you are not yet a woman either, so there is no obligation to give you the kiss of death. Satisfied?"

"No. Shampoo can marry Mousse if she wants despite rejecting him."

Cologne cackled. "Fine. There's no way my great-granddaughter would ever marry that blind idiot."

"We'll just see about that, old ghoul." said Mousse as he freed Cologne. "I think I've proven today that you've completely underestimated..." Mousse crumpled from a whack on the head by Cologne's staff.

"Uh, you aren't going to kill him or anything, are you?" asked Akane.

"No, but he'll wish he were dead once I put him to work here."

Ranma shrugged. "There's no place he'd rather be as long as Shampoo works here. Let's go."

"Wait," said Shampoo. She gave Ranma a gentle hug and said, "Ranma change law, but Ranma no change Shampoo's heart."

"I'm sorry about that. Maybe... I could talk with you about it sometime if you think that would help."

Shampoo nodded and wiped a tear from her eye. She waved goodbye as Ranma left with Akane. The pair was silent most of the way home, but Akane finally said, "I don't wanna say 'I told you so,' but..."

"I know, I know," said Ranma, "Talking can help sometimes, I guess." She sighed as they reached the Tendo household and saw Pop and Genma playing shogi. "It just doesn't work for people who won't listen to you."

* * *

Author's Note:

I got the name "St. Brutus" from Harry Potter; it's the school for "incurably criminal boys" his uncle threatens him with. In case you were wondering, this boarding school is in Japan, and I'm not going to have a Harry Potter crossover!


End file.
